Month: July 2006

Three of The Guys will be on vacation next week, so posts will be minimal if any. We will return the following week as scheduled.

Where are The Guys going? To International Clown Week, of course!

According to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Office, Mel Gibson was pulled over for speeding, but was then arrested and charged with driving drunk today. Allegedly, he had had too much of the sacrament. Gibson was released on $5,000 bond.

Upon being released, Gibson shouted, “FREEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!”

Gibson was pulled over today? It’s a little after 4 p.m. now. In Los Angeles it’s just after noon. Someone’s enjoying the life of a crazy Catholic millionare.

UPDATE: Upon review, SG was one of the first to break this story, because where ever there is booze, you will find us.

This story is posted for no other reason than the fact that this blog enjoys seeing the phrase “breast flash” back in the headlines again.

SeriouslyGuys: We’re just trying to find words that make us giggle.

Scientists are sounding more and more like stoners these days. Perhaps Stephen Hawking sounds like that–with an electronic voice, of course.

SeriouslyGuys is all about service. Yes, service to our loyal readers (all three of you). To help you get a jump on our holiday season, we’re providing a holiday wishlist and even keeping it short–we’re far too modest to make a huge, whopping list.

1) A new small jet so we can go to Vega–I mean, get new hot scoops … on the nation’s gambling and prostitution woes … *cough*

And if we don’t get to it later: happy holidays, seriously!

Working in the news world, you deal with a lot of crazy–crazy stories, crazy people and more. This more or less makes you develop a dark sense of humor about the world and people in general. Suddenly, you find yourself laughing at reports of a man threatening to kill himself and his fiancée (not in that order).

When those types of things happen, I’m always glad that I can come across stories like the formation of a new group in Maryland, headed by a local man and Greta Van Susteren’s sister, Lisa. The local man, who knows me through other stories, called me yesterday and announced the formation of the group aimed at making citizens of Maryland act more ecologically.

“What’s it called?” I asked.

“The Global Warming Action Alliance,” he said.

I nearly burst out laughing. Instantly I had an image of a group of convservation-themed super heroes forming a league.

Global Warming Action Alliance, ASSEMBLE!!!

Life is set to imitate art down in Crawford, Texas.

President Bush has two options here:

1) Obtain a restraining order, like Colin Farrell.

2) Move Sheehan into the ranch and allow wacky hijinks to ensue.

This blog normally frowns on television cliches, but option two is far funnier.

Good news, true fans of Harry Potter. If you want to see Potter flaunt his Hogwart, hop a flight to London and catch a performance of “Equus.”

Side note: Daniel Radcliffe, the actor, is going to play a psychologically unstable stable boy. This blog thinks that sounds like the premise of a movie on one of the subscriber-only channels late at night.

Lance Bass’s announcement has raised an important question in everyone’s lives: is my crush gay, lesbian or bisexual? This information is critical for every 12-year-old in the nation, as evidenced by the barrage of Lance Bass articles over the past two days.

As a service to you–our dear, lonely readers–here’s a list of gay, lesbian and bisexual celebrities. It was compiled by Wikipedia: the internet’s official source for settling all arguements not covered on IMDB.com.

Let the sobbing begin:

Celebrities A-E
Celebrities F-J
Celebrities K-O: This one’s a heartbreaker for me. Rosie O’Donnell, we hardly knew ye.
Celebrities P-T
Celebrities U-Z

Couldn’t find your crush on the lists? Perhaps they’re on the wagon:

Temporarily, but no longer, gay for media attention

If you are a gay, lesbian or bisexual reader looking for a new crush, then read the above with the opposite emotional responses.

SeriouslyGuys: Don’t say we never did anything for you.

The Girls Gone Wild tour bus will let nothing stand in its way on the road to topless paradise. Not even the occasional bicyclist who gets trapped under the wheels.