Day: July 18, 2006

A note to future copycat clones: don’t.

The moral of the story: make sure that everyone gets invited the next time that you have the office place over for an orgy. Oh, and there’s that whole “make sure that your spouse is out of the country too” thing as well.

I sure hope that the suspect gets conjugal visits in prison.

By the way, if the name Asheville sounds familiar, here might be the reason why:
Asheville Manager Joe Mikulik Meltdown

Your lunches are going to get a little more boring from now on.

(Brought to you by Reggie, Heather, Dick and Justin, who seem to be up on strange stories and are enjoying rubbing against each other)

UPDATE: The strippers’ mug shots.

Sugarcoating is what got these kids fat in the first place.

Key quote: “For several years the CDC has recommended that clinicians classify children who are overweight — above the 85th percentile on growth charts that track height, weight and age — as at ‘risk of overweight.’

“Those above the 95th percentile are called overweight — rather than obese — to avoid stigmatizing them.”

Doesn’t “at risk” mean you’re not there yet?

If you thought a euthenized whale would get you going, check this one out. This is the avian equivalent of 50 Cent.

Side note: Right now this blog thinks being a volunteer for the Bird Rescue Center in New Smyrna Beach is a cool job.

As it turns out, being fat might be bad for your health.

However, doctors say being a chubby chaser keeps you in excellent shape.

This should definitely improve the treatment of Wal-Mart employees.

First store policy change: all dresses must reach no more than two (2) inches above the knee when sitting.

Fifteen years and several new hairs later, he will tell shrouded women he was named for something else entirely.

Nothing’s like starting the day off right with some happy news.

Have a great day, everyone!