Month: September 2006

A London woman recently won the Guinness world record for longest fingernails. The 65-year old woman’s nails have not been clipped since 1979, they reach 24 feet, seven inches.

This blog is going to guess that trips to the bathroom with her are very gingerly accomplished.

It was only a matter of time. Perhaps she’ll be able to have a padded stripper pole to remind her of her yesteryears.

Google News–giving us access to headlines that most guys people wouldn’t normally have.

In SG’s continuing crusade to bring to you, our reader(s), news from the world of education and art, we give you a story from … the socially repressed nation of China? Involving nudity? Wha??!!

SeriouslyGuys may not be able to accurately tell you the difference between the Mona Lisa, a painting, and the Mona Lisa, a sandwich, but we can say this: 56 year old college professors are not pieces of art.

Being able to go to gun show whenever you’d like? An opportunity for the ages.

I still want jet boots.

UPDATE: In other Iron Man news ….

According to CNN, a man who wrote “Kip Hawley [Transportation Security Administration director] is an idiot” on a plastic bag holding his toiletries was detained at an airport.

Ryan Bird said he wrote it as a political statement. Bird was held for 25 minutes at a security checkpoint before he was deemed safe to fly.

In related news, the TSA has no sense of humor.

Who really believes scientists, anyway?

The fight back against our animal enemies has spread to Oakland, Calif. and has taken a weird turn as well.

Residents of East Oakland found a dead, 400-pound llama abandoned in their neighborhood. The animal was covered with a tarp. Authorities are baffled as to where the animal came from, how it died or why it was abandoned in Oakland.

Though llamas are considered less of a threat than stingrays or chickens, they are still guilty of harboring ill will toward humans. And for that, they must be punished.

You read your own obituary in the newspaper. What makes it even worse is that someone with the same name has claimed for decades his greatest accomplishment that was actually yours.

Then again, you do have the satisfaction of dancing on said impostor’s grave.

This is what happened to the writer of the “Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini” song. Naturally, this has gotten a lot of attention from friends and family.

Key quote: “‘This is not a game. I am who I am and I’m proud of who I am. But these phones don’t stop with people calling thinking I’m dead.’“

A team of French doctors recently performed the first zero-gravity surgery. The surgeons removed a cyst from a man’s arm as the plane they were on went in and out of zero-gravity.

Great, there’s an important scientific achievement.