Behold! A virgin is with child, or children, and she is due to give birth on Christmas. Is it the second coming?
No, it’s a Komodo dragon. Jesus is not going to be happy with his new form when he shows up next week.
Day: December 20, 2006
Goddone it
Apparently God helps Rocky beat the snot out of a younger guy.
It’s good to see the Almighty get His groove back, though we’re probably a long way from raining sulfur (which “is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer”).
I’m not an alcoholic I just drink a lot
This is above and beyond alliteration. Good thing she didn’t smudge her make-up.
Stripper-related news of the day
The Christmas spirit lives in us all! Exotic dancers in San Francisco will donate $15,000 worth of tips to the local Toys for Tots program, or as they like to call it, “Ta-ta’s for Toys for Tots.” I hope that “Santa Baby” was played during their “performances.”
And on nearly the other side of the United States, Missouri’s law banning nudity in strip clubs is struck down because it is unconstitutional. Also, because, y’know, nudity is kinda of the whole point of a strip club. Again, I call for “Santa Baby” to be played along with Christmas themed outfits. Christmas tree tassels for all!
Microsoft supports all creeds, genders and desires
… especially when their own products have been sold with special “cross-platforming capabilities”. Bow chicka wicka wow-wow.
Don’t fret too hard though. For their part, Wal-Mart, where the Zune was purchased, blamed the family Microsoft and gave the family a gift card.
Good news, whorish American
You’re not alone. In fact, you’re far from it.
Wait a minute: “The high rates extend even to women born in the 1940s, challenging perceptions that people were more chaste in the past.”
On second thought, that’s just kind of gross.