Day: March 21, 2007

Manny Ramirez, star both in his own head and those of Boston Red Sox fans, has decided to auction off a grill he once bought for $4,000. He will even throw in a signed baseball, possibly covered in barbecue sauce. It’s available on eBay.

Key quote: “Hi, I’m Manny Ramirez. I bought this AMAZING grill for about $4,000 and I used it once… But I never have the time to use it because I am always on the road. I would love to sell it and you will get an autographed ball signed by me =] Enjoy it, Manny Ramirez.”

That’s right, Manny uses emoticons.

A Phoenix TV station has fired the employee responsible for inserting a porn video into a broadcast of a news show starring Tom Brokaw. People, as your local optimist, I’m hear to let you all know that it could have been worse—he could have inserted a porn clip actually starring Brokoaw, you know.

Hey, everybody! Ahnold’s gonna beat the crap out of Rush Limbaugh!

Honestly, why would the biggest political has-been since Anne Coulter take on The Terminator? Hint: it rhymes with “datings.”

And that is how you sell-out.

Not just anyone can go into space. You have to be a certain height, weight and physical shape, or you just have to have a lot of money. Space tourist Charles Simonyi is a billionaire. Sounds to me like he’s got the right stuff.

But when you lead a life of comfort, you need to bring that comfort with you. That’s why Simonyi will be eating a meal selected by Martha Stewart including duck and quail. No Tang, either.