You know that feeling when it’s Friday before a major holiday and everyone’s ducking out of town? We know that feeling, too. We know you’re going to be too busy tomorrow to read us, and heck, we’re going to be too busy to write much anyway.
That’s why The Guys are taking tomorrow off, but we’ll be back here again on Monday morning with severe hangovers great stories for you to read.
You probably don’t want to commit a crime in China. But now, you definitely don’t want to hole yourself up in a hospital when Chinese police try to arrest you.
One 55-year-old murder suspect learned that lesson the hard way recently. The man fell into an air cushion after being sprayed with a high-power hose off a window ledge on the eighth story of a hospital ward. Greatest arrest ever.
Girls Gone Wild’s Joe Francis has been ordered to get a little less wild … in jail.
Don’t worry Joe. There’s always a bright side to things.
-Perhaps your fellow inmates will take off their jumpsuits for you.
-Maybe the wardens will even let you make some crappy hats for them.
-Think of the new video–“Inmates Gone Wild: Supermax.”
The U.S. Coast Guard had an unusual rescue in Texas, recently. For one thing, the rescue was on land. For another thing, it was saving a man and his cockatoo (which, coincidentally sounds like an album title).
According to the Associated Press, the man’s $2,000 cockatoo flew the coop and ended up at the top of a pine tree. So he went 60 feet up to get it. When the man was unable to get down, the Coast Guard had to send a helicopter to pick up the two.
Note: Keeping pets is perfectly OK in the War on Animals. They are considered prisoners of war.
