Day: May 1, 2007

Look, look!

Flashers are rampant all over this great country. Still, sometimes they’re not the brightest of people. After all, if you’re going to celebrate your graduation by going skinny dipping and pushing a police golf cart into a pond, it’s probably a good idea to take your pants—and your ID–with you when you leave. Plus, it’s Minnesota, while it may be warm everywhere, it’s probably not there.

Now, as for the legal side of things, and not too far away from merry old Minnesota, New York City wants to increase punishments for subway flashers. Well, I’m that takes all the fun out of your morning commute, you grouchy denizens of NYC.

Why, even across the pond, flashing is rampant. When rugby players in England lose a match, they apparently have to run home naked. (LINK IS NOT SAFE FOR WORK) And people think Bobby Knight is a tough coach.

Remember people, when The Man is trying to take away your fun, don’t back down from him-just show him your stuff. Well, maybe not in NYC. But everywhere else is cool beans.

Good news and bad news

Good news: Taco Bell and KFC are apparently trying to go healthy. They’ve now been downgraded from “toxic sludge” to “poison”. Plus, healthier severed fingers and rats!

Bad news: Now if you eat at either of the two places, you’ll be living less dangerously. And chicks love danger. As such, the more you eat at Taco Bell or KFC, the less chance that you’ll have for picking up a lady.

Well, OK, maybe some things never really change.

This week in alcohol

After a fun night out at the bars, one German man in Berlin found himself far too drunk to drive. He made the mature decision about it and didn’t drive. He did, however, get on his horse to head home. Realizing he was too tired to make it there, he stopped at a bank, locked his trusty steed and himself in the outer lobby where the ATMs were and slept it off.

First off, who has horses in Berlin? Secondly, when you’re drunk, the world is your bed.

Think you don’t need math? If you like drinking, you are sorely mistaken. U.S. scientists have come up with a mathematic formula to pour a pint of beer with the perfect amount of foam. Good luck understanding it, though.