You know, in the grand scheme of all things, there’s probably nothing wrong with having a shoe fetish; however, stealing 1,500 pairs of them might be going a little too far. Maybe you should switch to something easier, like stamp collecting or counting the number of dirty spots on your ceiling.
Day: May 30, 2007
You’re old
Today is Bryan McBournie’s birthday. We at SG would just like to point that out. Well, that and he’s old.
Its snout takes what it wants
The War on Animals continues to a possibly deadly level-an elephant is now attempting to mug people.
That’s right people, the animals are now sending elephants out as common hoodlums. Why, I wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t have Thug Life tattooed across its tusks. Be fearful of this elephant teaching such a trick to its offspring, lest we find ourselves in a world full of elephant enforcers waiting to break our kneecaps.
Movies: now for sissies again
Regal Cinemas, one of the largest theater chains in the country, is testing a pager for movie patrons to anonymously report other patrons.
While this sounds like a dream come true for anyone who’s ever had a foot on their head, there’s a hitch. There are only four buttons, and then the management comes in to find the problem.
This blog wants to know when they will add a button for “annoying jerk with flashlight and bow tie.”
Fun quote: The GRS’s are wireless and have four buttons marked “picture,” “sound,” “piracy” and “other disturbance.”
It’s Mao-tastic!
As we reported yesterday, Chinese women are pretty strange. Now, a woman is parading around China dressed as Mao Zedong, complete with haircut and gray suit. When your nation’s patriarch is being impersonated by a woman, it’s time to call it quits.
Key quote this blog doesn’t understand: “But the effortless poses belie fastidious preparations behind the scenes.”