Take it from Snee: Will the real Hitler please stand up?

The Internet has a term for it: Godwin’s Law. The law reads, “As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one.” Because the Internet is an extension of the real world (e.g., celebrities’ buzz cuts and nipple slips), the go-to comparison of anything to Hitler is based on its frequent occurrence in every debate since 1941. So a new question arises: is everything today related in some way to Adolf Hitler and, as Walter Sobchak put it, the tenets of National Socialism?

Continue reading Take it from Snee: Will the real Hitler please stand up?

Sip some Dutch courage and storm the beaches

The world is going to hell in one of those cute little baskets on the front of girls’ tricycles–everyone knows that. In times like these, sometimes the only respite we have can be found at the bottom of a bottle. But on beaches across the country (OK, maybe just the coastal areas) local governments are working to ban booze from our nation’s shores.

The latest front, or frontage, in this battle is San Diego (Spanish for “Home of the Padres”), where a ban has just taken effect. That means San Diegans, thirsty after lying all day in the sun, cannot quench themselves with a sweet, sweet diarrhetic. This cannot be allowed to stand! How else can they enjoy the incredibly mild and regular weather with which their municipality has been blessed?

“Calls for more stringent regulations on drinking at city beaches followed a Labor Day melee in Pacific Beach, where police in riot gear arrested 16 people after being pelted with beer cans.”

So the party may have gotten a little out of hand, but it was the workers, whom Labor Day celebrates, that chose to celebrate in such a fashion. You’re telling us the workers can’t celebrate however they want? That’s like telling Santa Claus he can’t do a little B&E on Christmas Eve.

It’s time to fight back, drunkards! Gather up all your empty bottles and get the deposit back on them, then e-mail me with updates. We’ll pool our funds and make a road trip out to San Diego to protest. Let’s fight this before they make Corona’s entire ad campaign illegal!

The small can bring down the gigantic

Once again, our uneasy relationship with scientists is firmed up just a little bit more, as a new study comes out and says something that we agree with for a change. Finally, there is some evidence that a comet didn’t kill the dinosaurs. While this blog believes it was humans, in one of the earliest battles of the War on Animals, the study says it may have been one animal allies that betrayed the thunder lizards: insects.

Yes, bugs may have been responsible for spreading diseases and infections among the dinosaurs, killing some and weakening others. Best of all, the theory shows insects early on seemed to hold a mercenary role, and were likely under our prehistoric payroll. We need to re-examine this option and try to bring back this old alliance. If any of you out there not in an asylum have connections to the insect world, please run this by them.