Day: February 12, 2008

Eat My Sports: Love Shaq

In regards to Valentine’s Day, and amongst the swirling rumors that Bryan McBournie and I are in a “tiff,” I’m putting down the gloves this week. I’m also leaving the NFL alone … until the draft.

Last week the NBA’s version of the Miami Dolphins, ironically enough the Miami Heat, traded All-Star Center Shaquille “Nick Nolte, I’m sorry about ‘Blue Chips'” O’Neal to the Phoenix Suns. I would under normal circumstances mention who those players were, but the Heat suck, so they get nothing, not even in love week. So, The Big Aristotle got dealt, and I feel like the only one who thinks that this was bigger than the trades that got the Big Three into Boston. Side note: Dear New England, I don’t hate the Celtics or Bruins, I love the Sox, it’s just the Pats, Boston’s a baseball town anyway. Continue reading Eat My Sports: Love Shaq

The sea is teeming with lethal life

We’ve been covering the dangers of the ocean a lot lately, but there seems to be more happening this time of year in the warmer seas and the cold depths, where animals are designed to withstand such harsh climate.

On this front, we have some shocking news to report: killer jellyfish are real and they seem to be breeding like rabbits. Yes, these things are not only weird looking, they can also kill you with a single sting and they happen to be having something of a baby boom. They are no doubt massing for an all-out assault on our shores. Just remember this: they can’t hurt you on land.

However, animals are not the only ones making moves in the war at sea. Swedish scientists are planning to launch 60 fish in a rocket from Antarctica. It’s nice to see the Swedes finally join us in our fight, and making an entrance with marked creativity. Sure, the scientists say it’s an experiment to figure out motion sickness, but we know better. It’s called sending a message.

North (sort of) and South: Civil War redux?

While last week we told you about the brewing civil war between Georgia and Tennessee, it seems they are not the only two states ready to fight brother against brother. Ohio and Kentucky are about to take up arms against one another–not over a land dispute for a resource vital to any state, but rather a big rock.

A rock sat at the bottom of the Ohio River for ages, only when the tide was low in centuries past would people climb on it and leave some kind of message. One man hauled it out of the river onto the Ohio side because it is an important part of the state’s history. As soon as Kentucky heard about it, the state got upset, because the rock was on the Kentucky side of the border.

The states’ houses of representatives have both passed resolutions about how important the rock is. No word as to whether U.N. peacekeepers will be asked to patrol the border.