When a postman attempted to defend his drink driving (British for “drunk driving”) by claiming he stores booze like a pelican in a balloon in his throat, the court would have none of that. Instead, he was charged with driving while more than double the legal limit and sentenced to £600 (British for “$1,200”) and banned from driving for 18 months.
So, to recap: that’s one charge against alcohol (BOO!) and one against animals (YAY!).
Image: “Lunch Time” by Neil Gould.
Nearly half a year after their $84 million dollar porn filter was hacked by a 16 year old, the Australian government has finally admitted that the whole project was a failure. Hey, at least they owned up to it: it’s been almost five years, and we still can’t get movie studios to admit that Dumb and Dumberer was a bad thing.
*snigger*
This headline is presented by SeriouslyGuys: where some words have other meanings that are dirty.
We are gathered here this morning to discuss something very important in everyone’s lives, more importantly, other people’s lives. That subject is the beauty of a wedding and the free alcohol that comes with it.
This past Saturday I spent in Boston for a friends’ wedding. For those of you who have never been to Boston in February, I highly recommend it. It’s beautiful this time of year. It was an oppressively warm 26 degrees on Saturday, with not a cloud in the sky. Most of the snow had melted, leaving only salt and mud behind. This is why Boston’s tourism flourishes during February.
I am convinced that everyone who attends a wedding has one thing on their minds: “I hope this thing has a nice spread.” In this regard, some weddings are better than others. This is what can make or break a wedding for most people. On Saturday, I was not disappointed. There were roughly five courses, or plates, I can never remember the difference, and each one was better than the one before it.
But the best part was the open bar. There, I was free to imbibe as many Jack and Cokes as my liver desired (there was also some drink ordering for the date, as well). There is something mystical about an open bar and being all dressed up for an event. It makes you want to drink, but look fancy doing it. What may have been the smartest move overall at this wedding was there was no dancing, nor was there karaoke. I say this not because I was in danger of dancing or singing (though I was tempted on the Frank Sinatra songs), but because seeing other people do it can ruin an experience.
The year is still young, and by my count, I still have four more weddings on my schedule. May the brides and grooms have eternal happiness, and may the food at their receptions be excellent.
