Take it from Snee: 2028 Predictions
Posted on April 30, 2008
Filed Under Take it from Snee, The SeriouslyTimes 2028 | Leave a Comment |
OL, so most a few of my 2008 Predictions were proven wrong. (There’s no point in revisiting any of them or eating any crow.) I’ve learned my lesson about dabbling in the dark, forbidden arts and will never repeat my mistakes again.
So, now I’m going to make a prediction that I can smugly point to for 20 years before proven wrong. I hereby introduce my first in a series of 2028 news predictions. Read more
Written by Rick SneeAmy Winehouse: Fun chick at a bar
Posted on April 30, 2008
Filed Under Booze News | Leave a Comment |
Few singers have break out hits that are really about their personal lives, Amy Winehouse is one of those few. (For those of you who don’t know, her hit single is “Sweet Home Alabama.”) The English singer has been in and out and in and out of rehab, but now it appears she’s in trouble with the law once again.
Winehouse, whose name appears to be as booze-soaked as she was, took on two men in a barroom brawl in London recently. She allegedly hit one man who got in her way while she was playing pool and headbutted a “bloke” as he tried to hail her a cab–both grounds for suspected assault.
Oddly enough, alcohol may have been involved.
Written by Bryan McBournieVision problems not unusual in public bathing
Posted on April 30, 2008
Filed Under Regular Post, Tokyoh-no! | Leave a Comment |
Sukayu, one of the Japan’s most famous hot spring resorts, has a slight problem: ladies are sick and tired of the guys taking glances at their pride and joy. This is an easy enough problem to fix, right? Just erect a wall, and hey, everything’s taken care of. No fuss, no muss, right?
The fuss is of epic proportions.
Sukayu has always been a mixed bath, meaning that the starers and the stare-ees bathe together. Additionally, by blocking the stares of pervs, they would be breaking a tradition ranging over 320 years old. Oh, the choices to make! Such choices!
Hey, Japan, here’s a little hint, free of charge: if this bath thing is 320 years old and still popular, it’s probably because these guys know they can get clean and sneak a peek at the same time. I’m just saying, is all.
Written by Chris "Chugs" Taylor‘I’d like to ass you a question’
Posted on April 30, 2008
Filed Under Sex Sells, Stripper News | Leave a Comment |
13 lacrosse players were suspended from Huron High School in Ann Arbor, Mich., for a … cheeky shenanigan. They wrote a prom invitation to Carolyn Campbell across their hineys, the last several asking “Yes or No?,” for Kristoff Wennersten.
In response, she chose not to make Wennersten the butt of the joke and patted his tookhas, which was marked as “yes.” (You can’t spell “Wennersten” without “wenner.”)
However, scores of other parents, who were waiting for Kristoff to ask them, felt rebuffed and complained to Huron High. An anonymous source says that one mother called the situation “sh–ty.”
Written by Rick SneeInmates on the loose!
Posted on April 30, 2008
Filed Under War on Animals | Leave a Comment |
Attention residents of Florida, be on the lookout for the Lakeland 15.
Authorities say 15 monkeys have escaped from a modern day Alcatraz for primates. The monkeys escaped by swimming across a pond from the island where they were being held. How lax can security be? Do they not know that monkeys can swim? It’s only gorillas that are afraid of water (if the Congo tells us anything about life).
They claim the monkeys are not dangerous, but we know better. These supermonkeys obviously are hellbent on bringing an end to life in Florida, which is the sole job of Floridians. We would tell you to arm yourselves, but we already know you did.
Written by Bryan McBournieEat My Sports: Draft busts
Posted on April 29, 2008
Filed Under Eat My Sports | 4 Comments |
It is way too early to speculate who came out a winner in this weekend’s NFL Draft in New York. If the draft has shown anything over the years, it is that the draft is an inaccurate science in which the true results are not shown til months, possibly years later.
With that in mind, we’ve decided to go over the top 5 draft busts of all-time in the NFL, and don’t worry Michael Irvin, this is a work-based bust, not drug bust. Read more
Written by Bryan SchoolsKidz Korner: Economics of supply, demand
Posted on April 29, 2008
Filed Under Kidz Korner, Sex Sells | 1 Comment |
Hey, kidz! After seeing Miley Cyrus’ risqué photo-shoot, you may be asking yourself, “How do I get in on that action?” First of all, shame on you for talking like a bookie: you were raised better than that. Second, you can’t expect to make millions of dollars on your first foray into child pornography fame and fortune, you silly-billy.
You see, the economy (that’s a grown-up word for “managing more money than your dad makes”) is based on supply and demand. This basically means that if there’s a lot of something that’s given away for cheap or free, then it is worth little money. But if there’s only a little of something and everybody wants/needs it, then it is worth a crapload of money. Read more
Written by Rick SneeMaster of marital arts
Posted on April 29, 2008
Filed Under Booze News | Leave a Comment |
When a couple gets married it is a cause for celebration (unless it is one of those marriages). And different people have different ways of celebrating. Some dance and enjoy the open bar, some practice their bicycle kicks.
A Pennsylvania couple were married recently and held their reception at a local Holiday Inn. As the happy couple entered their hotel room, the groom, apparently not planning on consummating the marriage that evening, kicked his new bride. A fight between the two lovebirds broke out, causing guests from another wedding to rush over and see what the clamoring was about.
When the two men got a hold of the groom, the bride began attacking them, too. The fight spilled into the hallway and the police had to be called in. Strangely enough, alcohol may have been a factor. Mazeltov!
Written by Bryan McBournieStealing games is a two star offense
Posted on April 29, 2008
Filed Under Regular Post | Leave a Comment |
Not one game out there thrives on controversy more than the ones in the Grand Theft Auto series. Known for ridiculous violence involving jet packs, porn stars former porn stars taking a turn at voice acting, pixelated (literally) sex achieved through hacking peripherals and plenty of racial slurs, no one involves controversy more than these games. So what happens when a game that’s based on making perfectly immoral (but fun) decisions is the target of crime in real life?
Irony.
Grand Theft Auto IV, the latest in the series, comes out this week came out today; however, according to Ars Technica, a “surprising amount of copies are not making their way to the individuals that ordered them.” Yes, not even 24 hours before GTA IV hits the streets crime is already on the rise in the form of a few UPS employees helping themselves to your pre-ordered murder simulator of choice. Slow news day? Yes. Hearsay? Oh yes. Ars Technica even says that this is simply “a novel situation” and later tells Kotaku that “In one 24-hour period, three workers were fired, and more interviews were scheduled for today that would likely end in termination.” Isolated incident? Almost totally.
So, what have we learned? Don’t go with UPS. Spend the extra 2 dollars to get it sent via Fed-Ex. There’s usually less incompetency as a whole that way.
Written by Chris "Chugs" TaylorSleep not in thy church
Posted on April 29, 2008
Filed Under Regular Post | 1 Comment |
If you get sleeping in Beantown, it is recommended you don’t take a nap in or around a church. You just might get picked up for vandalism.
In this fine country, you are innocent until proven guilty, so this blog is not going to make blanket statements like “this guy did it.” All we are saying is that he was found sleeping downstairs the day a church was discovered to have been vandalized and burglarized.
Either way, there is no napping allowed in God’s house, it seems. That kind of makes sense, though. It’s rude to go over to someone’s house and fall asleep in their basement, much less allegedly steal all of their fine silverware and oriental rugs.