Day: August 13, 2008

Take it from Snee: The McCain Saboteur


OK, I’ve kept my mouth (fingers?) shut–politically–since the Democratic primary. I mean, there isn’t much to this presidential race right now.

In the one corner, you’ve got Barack Obama. He’s young, black, has only served in Congress for four years and is a Democrat. Despite all of that, he’s running a smart campaign with few gaffes, won plenty of German votes and has managed to avoid any accusation of extra-marital affairs.

In the other corner, there’s John McCain. He’s old, white, has served in Congress for almost as long as I’ve been alive, nearly won the nomination in 2000 and is a Republican AND war vet. Sure, he’s had his mix-ups like outdated geography and screwing up the dance steps to the Macarena, but that’s been the winning formula since 1789, when George Washington shooed the first kids off the South Lawn.

So, no offense to Senator Obama, but why on Earth is McCain looking so bad? Is he really this clueless, or is there someone sabotaging his campaign? Continue reading Take it from Snee: The McCain Saboteur

Crappy art threatens Switzerland

American modern art strikes again! However, fear not if it hits a fan-it’s art, after all.

By the way:

A giant inflatable dog turd by American artist Paul McCarthy blew away from an exhibition in the garden of a Swiss museum, bringing down a power line and breaking a greenhouse window before it landed again, the museum said Monday.

If that’s not the most surreal sentence you’ve ever read, then I don’t know what is.

A pair of grande mugs … to go?

Long ago, SeriouslyGuys reported on a growing trend in Seattle – sexy coffee shops! Unfortunately, it seems as if the dream is dead. The craze in the Pacific Northwest for buck-naked baristas has apparently gotten out of hand as “Espresso Gone Wild” is being told to cover up or shut down. This brings a tear to many an eye. While the business owner should probably be arrested for that ridiculous name, I’m sure that the servers were nothing but innocuous at best. Won’t someone please think of the children health code violations imminent burns?

Don’t give in just yet, Pope Benedict

The Italian form of PETA is urging Pope Benedict to stop wearing animal fur on his clothing. Apparently it’s OK to have a guy die for your sins, but it is unethical to wear the skin of the beasts that God gave him domain over. We can only assume that Benedict is an SG enthusiast, and is continuing his support after we raised our animal alert to code red. Once again this is only speculation.

Ingenuity and creativity still no match for common sense

A man in Colorado has been trying to scam free porn by claiming to be from the police department’s “age verification unit” and demanding that a local sex shop give him DVDs to inspect. After all, he was the “porn inspector.” Did his plan follow or fall through? The suspense must be killing you, right?

Here’s a hint: the answer to the question rhymes with “they didn’t fall for it.”

Maybe he should go back to his day job at the porn bureau. Just hope that the guy flashed, at most, his badge.

Willy-nilly silly old bear

We’ve all been here, haven’t we?: You dress up in a Winnie-the-Pooh costume with a couple of your friends (dressed as a mouse and a panther, of course) when some people start laughing at you for going out like that in person. You get so mad at them that you kick the crap out of them and take their wallets.

This story, practically as old as time itself, happened to a 20-year old in Japan recently according to police. Sure, one could blame the fact that he was wearing a costume as grounds to laugh, but who is the real culprit here. We all know who is at fault: Pooh. Without Pooh’s harmful influence, this man might not be facing criminal charges. His cries of “Oh, bother!” and incessant honey eating have been degrading children generation after generation. Let’s not forget that he is, in fact, a bear, or that his best friend, Piglet, has a tao, whatever that is.

Yes, this blog snickered at the word, “Pooh.”