Day: March 23, 2009

The McBournie Minute: Weaponize the ISS

Less than a year ago, I called for the completion of the International Space Station. As usual, I was right, and people listened to me. In fact, I scared the crap out of the world’s space community that they are going to finish up the ISS this year. Heck, there’s even a team of our astronauts up there right now putting up the final solar panels.

You’re welcome, world.

And yet, there is more work to be done. A couple weeks ago, the crew on the ISS had to run to the escape capsule because a piece of space debris came within three miles of them. It happened again after that, and yes, just yesterday, they had to avoid another piece of space garbage.

Folks, there is a lot of man made crap up there orbiting the Earth, and it’s not just satellites that let you watch television, either. It’s bits and pieces of all the American, Soviet/Russian and now Chinese (Welcome, country that can’t make safe plastic products!) launches that are continuing to fall at a speed and angle consisent with the slope of the planet and its gravitational pull without decaying (orbit). Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Weaponize the ISS

Her algebra is off the hook!

The Guys would like to wish a very happy birthday to one very smart lady.

Born today in 1882 in the Bavarian town of Erlagen, she would go on to to make groundbreaking contributions to abstract algebra and theoretical physics. Albert Einstein would later describe her as the most important woman in the history of mathematics.

She may have died in 1935, but we think this little German adding machine can still solve for sex. We put it to you, Internet:

Wii would like a jail cell

Mohamed Zeki Mahjoub is an Egyptian who received political asylum in Canada, and then was imprisoned as a terror suspect for his close ties to Osama bin Laden’s business and other unsavory folks. After six-and-a-half years in “Guantanamo North” (what do they do, poutine-board you?), he got his release, but a judge imposed some strict requirements on him, still finding him to be a risk to Canadian national security.

Among them: no Internet access. Since the Wii has a connection and a browser on board, bye-bye Mario Kart! Somehow, despite Nintendo’s super-junked up online code system, it’s theoretically possible to send a message to fellow terrorists. The authorities confiscated the console.

Mahjoub says that this, along with other onerous conditions of his release, has destroyed his family life, so he’s asked to be returned to the prison Canada set up in Ottawa to house terror suspects.

Nintendo: making the world better for possible terrorists, one Mii at a time.

Who really wants to hear all that chirping, anyway?

Of all the animals we need to kill, birds may be the most important. Think about it: birds are the only type of animal that live in the deepest forests, the hottest deserts and the biggest oceans. We’ve used birds to communicate with each other, and we have even taught some birds how to talk. So how do we know they’re not spying on us and reporting our positions back to other animal foes?

With that in mind, we seem to be doing well in the fight against birds. According to a report by the federal government, we’re putting many species of birds in danger just by being us. We destroy their habitats and sometimes hit them with cars. Remember, we you see poop on your car, nine times out of 10, it’s from a bird. Isn’t it time you bought a high-powered rifle?