Day: June 11, 2009

MasterChugs Theater: ‘The Hangover’

If you’re reading this and haven’t seen The Hangover yet, then I am very disappointed in you. And not in the good way, but in the “Dad’s not mad, just disappointed in you” kind of way.

Go. Leave now. Stop reading this and head to the nearest theater now.

You’re still here, aren’t you. Sigh. Okay, well, if you’re going to persist in this, you might as well read on to find out exactly why you should seeing this movie. Hit the jump for knowledge!  Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: ‘The Hangover’

Schadenfreude: Make a scene

It’s the early afternoon. You already got away for lunch. There’s maybe one more break in the afternoon, but you don’t even smoke anymore.

Wouldn’t it be great if your entire career was wearing evening gowns to mall openings? That your only actual work was to maintain a healthy body weight and try not sound like a moron in your annual job interview pageant?

Well, buck up, little camper: Carrie Prejean is no longer Miss California USA.

After receiving a second chance from Donald Trump to hold her title, she showed her gratitude by being a lousy beauty queen.

It’s like the national-level judges somehow knew she’s an idiot when they denied her the Miss USA crown. Of course, she’s the one who brought her comments to the media’s attention when she lost in the first place.

Taking a PR page from Heidi and Spence Montag, she’s now accusing Trump and the California-level authorities of firing her because of her anti-same sex marriage stance … a month after they defended her for it.

Mm, Schadenfreude: make it every morning’s shameful joy.

Dedication sometimes yields near explosive results

Stop me if you’ve heard this fish story before: Man goes fishing in the Gulf of Mexico. Man’s fishing rod begins to go crazy. Man figures that he’s caught one gigantic fish. After a long battle, man finally manages to reel in his catch. Man’s catch is a live guided missile.

Wait, you haven’t? Well, it’s happened.

What’s fairly awesome, though, about this deadliest catch is the dedication shown by this man to his craft. Most will go out at ungodly hours of the day/night, or sit through torrential rains, or bear sub-freezing temps, but this guy floated around in the Gulf with unexploded ordinance in his boat for 10 days.

Someone get this guy his own fishing show, otherwise, he may just accidentally kill us all with his next catch.

That one hit the $300,000 parking spot

It’s fun to have a little extra cash to spend every now and then. You can treat yourself to a new game, a few drinks out, hookers for Rick Snee, buy SeriouslyGuys stuff, or a $300,000 parking space in Boston.

You read me right, $300,000 for a parking spot with no amenities. And you thought we were stupid for purchasing stock in GM.

Baking is dangerous

Here in America, we pledge not to put body parts into our baked goods. It’s not a law specifically, it’s just more like an understanding we have with the bakers. However, that can’t be said about Spain.

That’s where a trade union is suing a bakery for throwing away something they shouldn’t have. A baker apparently lost his arm in some of the machinery (baking is a pretty machine-oriented job, apparently) and while the man himself was taken to the hospital, the bakery threw away his arm, which apparently was not the correct choice.

The arm wasn’t found until a day later, and doctors were not able to reattach it. If they could have, how great would it be to have one arm smell like freshly baked bread?