Day: June 15, 2009

The McBournie Minute: When do I get to riot?

Pittsburgh and Los Angeles had a heck of a weekend, as I understand it. I didn’t watch either game, mostly because I don’t care about any of the teams, but I know how they turned out. Kobe Bryant has a non-Shaq-related ring, and Bing Sidney Crosby gets to carry around a big silvery cup for a day.

I’m not here to talk about the sports, I’m not even here to talk about why I don’t care about who won and who lost. No, I am here to ask–why not my city? When will I get a chance to burn a police car?

This has been a recurring theme in my life. I never end up living in the city of a championship team, and when one of my teams does win the championship of whatever sport it is they play, everyone heads downtown to climb a few lamp posts and smash some windows. Meanwhile, I’m hundreds, if not thousands, of miles away. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: When do I get to riot?

Guest Post: Miss South Carolina on the heart

After several stories on the Miss California USA saga and on the heels of her appearance on Tosh.0, Lauren Caitlin Upton — the former Miss Teen South Carolina USA — agreed to write a guest post for SeriouslyGuys. Her topic is on the latest startling medical news that more than half of Britons cannot identify the heart on a diagram of the human body and 70 percent cannot identify the lungs.

She may be also teasing the British for their smiles.I personally believe that U.K. British … are unable to do so because, uh, some … people out there, in their nation, don’t have anatomy charts.

And, uh … I believe that their education, like such as in South Africa, and the Iraq, everywhere, like, such as …

And I believe they should, uh … their education over there, in the U.K., should help the U.K. or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and Asian countries so they will be able to build their future … for them.

Thank you, South Carolina.

The faker it is, the more vile its nature

EA’s recent PR stunt at E3, in which they organized a protest outside the LA Convention Center and hand out pamphlets directing people to WeAreSavedGroup.org for their upcoming game Dante’s Inferno, was a stroke of genius. You can call it dumb, or cheap or dirty, but the fact remains that it got them a crap ton of press in both the gaming world and the mainstream, and it fooled a whole lot of people — whether they admit to be fooled or not. This would usually be what you call a successful PR move.

Not so much on all fronts. It would seem that even a fake group can offend — though, in this case, it offended those they stereotyped. Like Pavlovian dogs trained to raise their head if someone mocks an aspect of Christianity, some Christians were offended.

“‘It’s been clear for a while now that the entertainment industry views Christians on the whole as priggish, thin-skinned fun-killers,’ writes Margaret Cabaniss on her website.”

Sadly, she’s not alone in her ability to present an ironic statement about how Christians are actually hip and with-it when it comes to gaming. Catholic Video Gamers had a few choice words to say too, culminating in,

“So instead of engaging in a shamelessly anti-Christian stunt to promote your poor excuse of a product, maybe you ought to work on making this game, you know, something better than a blatant God of War rip-off and make it, ya know, something worthwhile?”

Newsflash, people: we’re talking about a game that’s already made. So your admonishment to pour the effort spent hating Christians back into making the game is moot.

Win some, lose some

It’s Monday morning, and we’ve got good news and bad news for you. We know you’re already grumpy, so let’s start off with the good news.

Remember back in January when a double bird strike caused US Airways Flight 1549 to ditch in the Hudson River? Well, New York City is ready to deal with the Canada goose threat. They are going to start culling geese. It’s so seldom to see any government body so willing to fight against our animal enemy, but clearly, we have a friend in New York.

And then there’s the bad news. Sea stars, better known to the common man as starfish, are booming off the coast of New England. The worst part is that no one’s exactly sure why it’s happening. Starfish are dangerous creatures, even if you cut them in half they will regenerate and become two star fish. That’s just not good.