Day: August 5, 2009

Take it from Snee: Just a few things

Sometimes, there are things I want to get off my chest that wouldn’t warrant a full weekly column for each. In the past, I’ve done these as Lightning Rounds, and that’s what I’m still calling this. But, it’s not following the same format.

Basically, the following are too big for twitter, too small for “Take it from Snee” and too opinionated for regular SeriouslyGuys posts. It doesn’t help that I saw Funny People this weekend and, like the rest of America, now believe that I could do that. Continue reading Take it from Snee: Just a few things

Superheroes walk in Japan, save no one

Remember Japan’s Cyberdyne robotics company? The company that created an exoskeleton, named HAL 5, that could help injured or disabled people walk? Are you sure?

Well, they want you to know that they’re still and kicking. I mean, walking. Cyberdyne employees strapped on the robotic leg braces and took them on a 30 mile journey through Tokyo, via train, taxi, and on foot. The 24 pound suit made the commute easier for the demonstrators, but the technology is apparently aimed at people who have difficulty walking. And certainly not a covert coup by the machines to destroy us all.

Cyberdyne is very optimistic that more people-assisting technologies are in their future. And by people-assisting technologies, they secretly mean “people enslaving technologies.”

Your mother as a news provider

"My ovaries do NOT resemble raisins, f#@k you very much."

Jennifer Aniston said in an interview with Elle magazine that she is unconcerned with her “lonely girl” status. The childless 40-year-old actress has been single since her divorce from frequent People Magazine World’s Sexiest Man winner, Brad Pitt.

As her biological clock has ticked away, she’s been linked to short relationships with Vince Vaughn and John Mayer, but still has nothing to show for it on her finger.

Her career has also declined as she’s starred in stinkers like Rumor Has It, The Break Up and He’s Just Not That Into You, which seem to reflect her lack of a love life or reason to continue living.

But, hey, at least she’s still answering all of our questions about it, right?

The pirate life be a turbulent one

Yar! It be hard out there for a pirate!

Joining former Grokster exec Wayne Rosso, Pirate Bay’s Peter Sunde is abandoning the BitTorrent site he co-founded.

In a blog post (truly a most demonic contraption attached to a witch’s teet), Sunde stated:

“I have decided to not be the spokes person for The Pirate Bay anymore. The reasons are many but most importantly it takes too much of my time. I want to build something new and I want to focus my energy in a different direction. I have projects waiting to be finished, a book is waiting to be finalized and many more books are waiting to be read.”

Oh sure, ye be ready to have plenty o’ fun, but when the sharks be a-comin’ for ya, you decide to turn tail and escape on the only deck-boat available? You not be a pirate, but a landlubber through and through! In fact, what you should do is take a lesson from Matthew Crippen.

Crippen, a student at California State University, be facing 10 years in prison for modding multiple consoles, not to hide treasure and booty, but to play modded games. At only 27 and a student, the 10 years in prison might be the social equivalent of the hangman’s noose for that lad. Yar! Perhaps he should’ve used a bit less book smarts and bit more sea smarts and modded himself a boat to sail away to Secret Pirate Island!

Sigh. Clearly, there be far too many constabularies after simple privateers such as us.