Day: September 10, 2009

MasterChugs Theater: ‘The King of Kong’

Because of our highly important alcohol conference, we’re running a MasterChugs Flashback this week. Enjoy!

The sporting world has known its share of classic rivalries: Ali and Foreman, Evert and Navratilova, Barkley and Godzilla. To this storied pantheon of titans we can now add Billy Mitchell and Steve Wiebe, the crème de la crème of competitive Donkey Kong players.

The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters follows Steve Wiebe; an average dude living an average life with a wife and two kids. He’s the kind of guy who’s always had a hobby — be it baseball or music — but for one reason or another, has always come up short, mostly due to a string of bad luck dating all the way back to high school. A huge Donkey Kong fan from back in the day, Wiebe gets it in his head that he wants to try for the record — a high score secured by the great gamer Billy Mitchell back in 1982. A score that remained on top for years and years and years … until now. But it won’t be easy; Mitchell is a celebrity in the world of gaming, as well as a self-made millionaire due to his line of hot sauce. He’s a legend, who comes with a legion of fans and henchmen. Remember the Mantle/Maris home run race in 1961? Yeah, well this is even more intense.

No, really. It is. Hit the jump to see why. Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: ‘The King of Kong’

Alcohol and sea creatures don’t (usually) mix

If you’re at the beach and see someone drowning, think twice before helping them.

In Florida, a man had allegedly been drinking since 9 in the morning recently and when he decided to go swimming. He pretended to be drowning and rescuers came to get him. Rather than let himself be saved, the man threw a jellyfish at them.

In completely unrelated news, The Guys are headed out tomorrow for a weekend-long experiment with alcohol and a beach atmosphere.

(via Deadspin)

Representing the angry folks

"And keep your healthcare reform off my lawn!"With a single shout, U.S. Representative Joe Wilson (R-South Carolina) has become the face of what happens when a political party gets too comfortable shouting at passing cars.

Wilson could not contain himself during President Barack Obama’s speech about healthcare reform on Wednesday.

He shouted, “You lie!” after Obama promised the proposed bill would not provide health care to illegal immigrants.

Wilson stated that he “let [his] emotions get the better of [him]” because he disagrees with the President. However, several colleagues have attested that the phrase “illegal immigrant” is his rage trigger, no matter the context.

“Joe once shouted ‘Hot salami tuna roll!’ at me after I joked that E.T. was an illegal alien,” said Senator John McCain (R-Ariz.). “I thought he just really loved that little brown guy.”

Don’t lose your will to fight

In Thailand, they eat scorpions. This is thought to be a symbol of rage against the band that sang “Rock You Like a Hurricane.”

It also makes Thai people badass, but one former scorpion cook is giving up the fight against these killers.

In what has to be some sort of form of Stockholm Syndrome, the name felt guilty about cooking scorpions over the years, and to antone, he has begun to breed scorpions.

Folks, you don’t have to participate in the war, there’s no draft. But helping the enemy is nothing short of treason.

Hot Shots! Part 9/11

We live in troubled times my friends. There is an economic crisis at hand, the very real possibility of war at any moment is upon us and no one from the cast of Full House is relevant anymore. We need strong leadership, we need something to galvanize us together as a country, we need Charlie Sheen demanding to speak with President Barack Obama about a 9/11 cover-up?

For those of you who like to stay current with politics and international affairs, 9/11 reaches it’s eighth anniversary tomorrow. And nothing says “let’s continue to move forward” quite like sitcom stars taking up our President’s time by harping on a subject that wasn’t even a part of his administration.

Way to go Charlie! Maybe next time President Obama will demand to speak to you about your Oscar snub for The Arrival.

*For giggles look at the bottom of the article after the political rant as the last sentence details Sheen’s marital status.