Day: October 26, 2009

The McBournie Minute: DirecTV practices the black arts

It’s Halloween time, that means everyone will have costume pictures on the Facebook profiles in a week we are half way through the Christmas shopping season it’s nearly time to party. Yours truly may not survive Halloween because I will be going to a murder party. Having never been to one before, I’m not sure what level of make-believe is. So if it comes down to them or me, my hunting knife ought to win out. I bought a fedora for my costume the other day, not because I am going to be Don Draper for Halloween, but the party is supposed to be a 1920s speakeasy. I plan to draw on my college experience to play the part of drinking in secret.

But still, because it’s that time of year, things are getting lame brands of spooky, mostly television and theme parks. We have to accept that they are getting faux-creepy, but sometimes they go a little over the top. I can put up with horror movie marathons and the New York Yankees in the World Series to give me the heeby-jeebies, but commercials are where I draw the line.

DirecTV has recently launched a few new famous movie scene re-dub commercials where they pay semi famous people like Naomi Watts. This time around they’re smacking us around with some action from David Spade–not that we asked for it or anything. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: DirecTV practices the black arts

Cards get a big bat (and a little sac)

Everyone knows that the strongest muscle in a coach's arsenal is his biceps.St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa will be back next season, but that’s not all. He’s bringing Mark McGwire on as the Cards’ new batting coach.

Hm, wonder which pharmacy nutritionist will sponsor his lesson plan.

But, seriously, what can he teach these young batters that isn’t already written on the back of the bottle?

And when they’re having trouble, can they trust him to actually tell them the truth, no matter how unpleasant it may be? (The “silent treatment” doesn’t work in America’s quietest pasttime.)

Weekend project: motorized recliner

Everyone hates the morning commute to work, particularly because you have to do it sober. But what if you could just relax a bit when you drive to work, or home from the grocery store, or the strip club? One man had that insight.

Dennis LeRoy Anderson, 62, was driving his motorized recliner, complete with headlights, cup holder, stereo and more down the roads of Minnesota. Unfortunately, Anderson was also drunk when police pulled him over. The driver recently plead guilty to DUI. He said he was trying to pop a wheelie and had a woman sitting on his lap. Isn’t that technically a motorized love seat?