MasterChugs Theater: ‘Super Fly’

“(Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song) made being a revolutionary hip,” Mario Van Peebles said a former Black Panther and Congressman once told him, “but Super Fly made being a drug dealer hip. Big difference.”

Van Peebles, whose father Melvin was the auteur behind Sweetback, makes a quite strong statement of how Hollywood capitalized on his pop’s movie and created an assembly line of action pictures starring Afro-American actors. However some of these films deserve a more fair shake. Super Fly, directed by Gordon Parks Jr., the story of a coke dealer who wants out of the biz, isn’t like the others, and even stands out in the gangster genre. Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: ‘Super Fly’

Last night’s ‘*bleep* Park’ episode

We’d like to extend a hearty congratulations to Comedy Central for almost having the courage to strike a blow for comedy and free expression.

Despite the “warnings” of a group of online Al-Qaeda wannabes, the network did air the 201st episode of South Park, which was the continuation of a two-part story concerning Muhammad and other figures the show has lampooned over the years.

Unfortunately, they also added extra bleeps, including over any mention of the name of Muhammad and the entire “I’ve learned something today …” exchange at the end. (We’d include footage, but Comedy Central refuses to release it online.)

That’s right: they covered the whole point of the episode with a long, offensive, caterwauling screech that we could still hear every time we closed our eyes to go to sleep last night. There are probably animals that are still running towards cable offices, trying to figure out who called them.

So, bravo, Comedy Central. Your cowardly sensibilities won out again, which have brought us such safe choices as “The Jeff Dunham Show” and “The Blue Collar Comedy Show.”

Remind us again: when has the safe choice ever worked out for you?

First it’s trash, then it’s temples

Raccoons have launched an assault on the famous Byôdô-in Temple in Kyoto, leaving scratch marks all over the ancient wood work (warning: link might be Not Safe For Work-exercise your own caution). For those of you who haven’t heard of it before, the temple is a national treasure akin to our Lincoln monument, except much older. Given that the structure dates back to the 10th century, there is actually some real cause for concern.

Strangely enough, Japan has sort of brought it upon themselves. Being that raccoons aren’t indigenous to Japan, you’d think some foreigner might be responsible for unleashing them, however that’s simply not the case.

Apparently, during the 1970s they became popular after appearing in an anime, and people had the bright idea of importing them from the US as pets. Yeah, that’s a good idea, as they were apparently importing close to 1,500 of them a year at one point. Needless to say, it didn’t take long before the government decided to place a ban on importing or even attempting to domesticate them.

Honestly though, how could anyone have ever thought that they’d make a good pet in the first place? I wonder how many of them attacked their owners before someone realized that keeping something with razor sharp claws and a nasty pair of fangs was a terrible idea. They’re not exactly cats and dogs, after all.

Wii would like to get robbed

We’re not quite out of this recession stuff yet. As such, we all need some extra money every now and then. A pair of women from Toledo, Ohio thought it would be a good idea to try and sell their Nintendo Wii consoles via Craigslist. Ladies: it is never a good idea to conduct video game business over Craigslist.

For that matter, it’s never a good idea to conduct any business over Craigslist.

In two completely unrelated incidents, one woman was assaulted when a prospective “purchaser” came to her home.

“As I kind of went to close the screen door, he then proceeded to come in,” she said. “He punched me in the face, grabbed the Wii off the end of the table and was gone before I even knew it.”

The other lady’s transaction went by without a hitch. Or so she thought. After the buyer had left with the console, however, the lady noticed they’d paid in counterfeit bills. Double burn!

Sleeping with the enemy

It’s a problem in every war: the allure of the adversary–well, really just their women. We heard it time and time again throughout history. Invading army conquers town booze and women go to the ravaging victors. Sometimes a ranking general is seduced by a sexy double agent and relieved of his secrets–among other things.

We cannot stress this enough: no matter how sexy they look, no matter how much they tempt you, no matter how much they beg, do not have sex with animals.

(Thanks, Leigh Ann!)