Take it from Snee: Bonaroo Book Report

This past weekend, I went deep undercover to investigate the unwashed underbelly of the patchoulingest music festival this side of Burning Man: Bonaroo.

So as not to arouse suspicion, I traveled in an assembled “hippie herd,” including a wife and another married couple. I disguised myself in a head bandanna and body odor.

What I uncovered shocked, entertained and disgusted me, often all at the same time. I witnessed both the glorious and ugliest sides of humanity. At times, I almost lost myself in the role, but after severe deprogramming with copious amounts of red meat, I return to bring you this report. Continue reading Take it from Snee: Bonaroo Book Report

We don’t want your money, but we want YOUR money

Oh Bobby Jindal. Do you really think that the internet forgets anything? Like the 45, 000 dollars spent on in-city helicopter trips among a time-span of 4 months or the refusal of money going to your state for economic stimulus purposes?

After meeting with President Obama and other Gulf Coast leaders, Louisiana governor Bobby Jindal called for BP to approve a $457 million seafood safety program for the region. Jindal held his press conference in New Orlean’s Acme Oyster House in the French Quarter-a symbolic location chosen to remind Americans how integral local oysters, shrimp, and crawfish are to the region.

Surrounded by commercial fishermen, Jindal reminded the crowd that seafood is hugely important to the state’s financial health (and that of the region as a whole). In Louisiana alone, the impact on the economy is estimated at $2.3 billion. The proposed safety plan is essentially a 20-year initiative that calls for industry safeguards and repair the damage done to consumer confidence regarding seafood in local waters.

As public anger over BP’s perceived lack of action continues to mount, it’s a savvy time to request funds. Jindal said the $457 million represents “a fraction of what we would lose year after year after year” should BP decline to the request. It’s just a drop in the bucket of what the oil company is going to end up shelling out for this mess, but for PR value alone, the money could be well-spent.

Remember people, it’s only acceptable to take money from big organizations for state purposes when it’s an election year.

At least someone’s listening

Hey kids! Are you having trouble sleeping at night? Of course you’re not, you’re a kid, you don’t want to go to bed because you’re not tired.

Hey parents! Are you sick of having to get your children to sleep at night? Do you feel bad about how many times you drug them so they’ll pass out? Just have them watch one of Venezuela President Hugo Chavez’s speeches.

Chavez said several children have told him that they recognize him from the television–when they go to sleep. The children were promptly executed.