Day: August 16, 2010

The McBournie Minute: Escaping you people just got harder for me

If you read this blog or follow me on Twitter, you probably know about my intense hatred for Apple products. It may not be the products so much as it is the people who swoon every time Steve Jobs opens his mouth.

I really began to hate Apple back in college, when the iPod was just getting off the ground. I regularly had to use iMacs for my journalism classes, as well as laying out the student newspaper. (Yes, kids, I really was involved in club activities in college. In this case, I was an editor and got paid peanuts for my hard work. It was a sign of things to come.) The iMacs were a bit tricky to figure out when I first started using them, but I’m pretty good at learning new systems, but I would be working on a page, and several times a day, the application would crash. Seldom had I so intensely hated an inanimate object, well, sober anyway.

But now there’s a new reason for me to be wary of anything that has a lowercase “I” at the beginning of its name: melting iPods want to ruin your commute. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Escaping you people just got harder for me

We ‘dislike’ your face

If you’re anything like us,  you spend a good percentage of your day maintaining your millions of Facebook fans and friends.

Since the days of stalking girls in your sociology class, the entire world has joined in ready to be your friend … until you say something that offends their sensibilities.

So, the next time you get a response from some whiny distant family member or employer about needing a “dislike” button, tell them it’s available as an app, and it’s faaaaantaaaaaaaastic.

Ad space made better with invisible actors

PETA: the terrorist organization that you can’t live with them, the terrorist organization you can definitely live without them. That’s probably the attitude that Dodge shares with us. A recent commercial by them had the company dress a chimpanzee up like Evil Knievel. We have no problem humiliating animals by putting them in funny outfits for the benefit of laughter, especially when they are performing a task for us.

But no, PETA felt that was far too much. Why should an animal do a job for us? As such, they began the most terrifying of actions: a letter-writing campaign.

However, Dodge magnanimously decided to respond back to said campaign.

Dodge apparently got PETA’s message and decided to have a little fun. They made another similar commercial touting an upcoming summer clearance sale, only this time, instead of a monkey, they cast … drumroll, please … an invisible monkey.

Don’t worry PETA. You don’t have to worry about any invisible monkeys being injured. But man oh man, is PETIS (People for the Ethical Treatment of Invisible Simians) gonna be pissed.

Put down the bottle when seeking a job

As it turns out, you shouldn’t drink during a job interview.

That’s exactly what science tells us. Even though it improves your vocabulary, American bosses look down on you when you order alcohol while being interviewed–in a dinner setting, that is. If you’re having your job interview in the office conference room and you order a drink, your potential employer may think you are needy. Model workers bring their own sauce with them.

Of course, if you offer them some hootch, it’s certain you’ll get in their good graces.