Day: September 21, 2010

Eat My Sports: Favre’d out

When Brett Favre made his debut in the NFL in 1992, I was nine years old. I really don’t remember watching him play until somewhere around the 1994 season. But even then you could tell something was different about this guy, in his early twenties you could tell he had the passion for the game most only had in high school or college. As his professional career went on, and on, and on, and on, his youth never escaped him, until now.

Watching the Minnesota Vikings these past two weeks, Favre looked something he never once did before, old and uninspired. Like he was being dragged out to play the game against his will. It’s a shame, because the NFL is a more entertaining environment not only when Favre is playing, but when he’s acting 15 years younger than he rightfully should. Continue reading Eat My Sports: Favre’d out

Rated ‘T’ for ‘Too Old’

If you’re bored with the World of Warcraft, then get ready for a new adventure on Planet Michael.

The planned online world will be based in a virtual Neverland that Tim Burton only brushed the dust off of with his Alice in Wonderland abortion and completely non-violent, using dance-based and musical problem solving.

The most remarkable part of the game is the character generation screen, where players can choose between 14 different noses and skin tints ranging from Motown Mocha to Anime Heroine.

We’re thinking … sea couch potato?

And now, an open letter to artists.

Dear artists and other crazy individuals:

Stop. Please stop it. Just because you can, doesn’t mean that you should. No one needs to use feces as paint for a canvas. Encasing a shark in a block of plastic is slightly weird. And just because you made a boat that looks like a couch, it doesn’t mean that you should ride on it. Given its shape and weight needed for floating, along with the material made in its production, what, do you really think that you’ll be able sit comfortably in it?

Yeah, that’s what we thought.

Sincerely, The Guys

$25,000 can buy a lot of tans

Phew! It’s like I just woke up from a bad dream. All I remember is something about rum, eyepatches and hard to read blog posts.

In New Jersey, there are some crimes even they can’t put up with. Sure, they may have a long reputation for being corrupt, classless and, let’s face it, greasy, but they put their foot down at some point. The police can only look the other way for some many things, like murder.

A New Jersey library wants a man arrested for not returning things he borrowed. OK, so maybe it was $25,000 worth of movies and something called “music books.” Still, they want that bastard arrested for excessive borrowing. Unfortunately, the Taiwanese national has returned to his native country and won’t be back until next year.