You Missed It: Cut the music edition

Good afternoon. I wanted to speak to all of you today because I have a very important message for all of you. I know that many of you have been calling for me to step down at once, but for the good of the blog, I cannot heed that request in good conscience. Good to your houses, go back to work. Wait, you can’t do both, can you? Either way, I’m not stepping down. If you were busy being elevated to the stage on Sunday for a grand total of 30 seconds before being lowered back down again, odds are you missed it.

Guitar Hero is dead. Long live Guitar Hero
The game-changing video game Guitar Hero is officially dead. Well, it’s mothballed at least, as far as Activision is concerned. The game maker cited declining sales as its reasoning for stopping production of new Guitar Hero games for now. Also a reason: People have hated music games since bars brought them in. It’s like karaoke, but worse.

Viral campaigning
In 1796, President George Washington gave his farewell address as he left office, and public life, for the last time. He warned against the U.S. getting itself into entangling treaties, and of course, married Congressmen posting shirtless personal ads of themselves on Craigslist. Rep. Chris Lee of New York stepped down this week after pictures surfaced of him shirtless, and looking for love. The family man apparently didn’t realize that it’s a lot easier to find your husband–or local congressman–online if you include a picture.

And from the world of too much funding
Science told us this week that according to a new study, the more popular a child is, the more likely he or she is to be a bully. The researchers who conducted the study asked for worker’s comp because of injuries related to “excessive atomic wedgies.”

They’ve got death threats on the Xbox Live now?

A boy from Maryland has been arrested after stealing access to a stranger’s Xbox Live account and using it to issue Columbine-style death threats, which is awesome if you want to get arrested quickly and surely.

Union County Prosecutor, Theodore J. Romankow revealed that the boy obtained access to the account via some shady deal on a “third party website.” Apparently the transaction involved a copy of “the Madden NFL”, although no further details have been made known. This would have made a TON more sense if it involved “the Madden PGA.”

The teenager then took the account, belonging to a Berkeley Heights HS student, and proceeded to send death threats to everybody on his friends list, which included other high school members. He declared he would bring a gun to school and start shooting people. After parents were alerted to the threats, they contacted the police. The owner of the Gamertag denied sending the messages, and after cops traced the account history, they discovered the actual perpetrator in Maryland. After cops finally tracked him down, it became clear there was no real threat.

Except for him getting plugged in prison (and we know what I mean). He could nonetheless face serious charges since stealing accounts and using them to issue death threats is still, y’know, a crime.

I see a tax in your future

Romania is continuing its hard-line stance against witches, so that probably means get ready for an influx of illegal immigrants making it to the East Coast on their brooms.

Witches, soothsayers, palm readers and such are now being taxed, but a new bill being considered by the Romanian legislature proposes to fine or jail those whose predictions don’t come true. Romanian witches, who apparently have a union or something, are none too thrilled with that idea.

“They can’t condemn witches, they should condemn the cards,” Queen Witch Bratara Buzea told The Associated Press by telephone.

[via Brooke H.]