Day: May 31, 2011

Eat My Sports: Basketball, relevant again

Well hello there, after being gone for nearly a month, it feels good to be back cramming my opinions on sports down your throats. For those of you wondering where I have been, and trust me, I know it has not been many, I was on vacation attacking rum inspired drinks for a week and a half only to come home and find out that my home had been attacked Noah’s Ark style by my upstairs toilet. So, I have been re-located for roughly four months. Now, who needs a drink? No? Ok, how about my 2011 NBA Finals prediction.

The talk all year long has been LeBron James this, Dwayne Wade that, Chris Bosh looks like the alien from “Predator” and let’s see how many ways we can make “take my talents to South Beach” a euphemism for something. Well, despite all the spite, the MoHeatos (tm, Bill Simmons) have been as good as advertised, ripping through the 76ers, Celtics and Bulls in convincing fashion. All the flack they got for not being able to close out physical opponents in close games has all but disappeared. Continue reading Eat My Sports: Basketball, relevant again

It’s like John Bobbitt but without the marriage stuff

Here at SG, we’re pretty manly, and we’re proud of that. We take pride in not bothering with asking for directions, our ability to char and singe the flesh of animals is second to none and we greatly enjoy being able to pee standing up (our efficiency in the bathroom with that of a woman is 500% better).

Now, we’re not big fans of the whole rape thing, so when a dude loses his urination efficiency because of an attempt, well, we’re inclined to go along with the woman. Nonetheless …

“It is quite an unusual incident. As far as I am aware, this is the first time that a woman has brought a severed penis to the police station as evidence.”

Maaaaaaybe the police in Bangladesh aren’t the brightest of people. Majorly shorn trouser snakes tend to be fairly distinctive, after all.

Warrior of the Week: Mark Zuckerberg

Like everyone else in the world, we’re a bit paranoid about what Facebook does with all of our information, but we just can’t help uploading our wild pictures from the party the other night. However, Mark Zuckerberg has gained a lot of street cred in our books, recently.

The founder of Facebook is now only eating what he kills. No, really, if he’s going to eat a salami sandwich, he hunts down a wild salami and kills it, before slaughtering it and serving it up. This also means he is personally executing all sorts of animals before he eats them, including a confirmed pig and goat.