Day: June 15, 2011

Take it from Snee: Not every day can be Flag Day

I was a little worried yesterday. I thought for sure that, since Schools’ column was yesterday, that he’d beat me to the punch writing about the world’s greatest holiday: Flag Day. Fortunately, I awoke very late and hungover to find an Eat My Sports that focused solely on that baskety-ball thing all the Jameses are playing these days.

Some people really get into Christmas. Others spend their parole reoffending on Halloween. I, however, am all about Flag Day. Not half-mast, but full-on Union Jacked! (I am aware that Flag Day is about the U.S. flag, but c’mon. All flags are welcome at my Flag Day table.) Continue reading Take it from Snee: Not every day can be Flag Day

A blog divided

We’ve often heard that war has a way of tearing a person apart, damaging them to their core. We never believed that because the History channel assures us that war is awesome, especially in color and HD.

But, now we’re not sure what’s right anymore. On the one hand, all animals have the potential to be extremists; therefore, they are all the enemy. On the other, today’s story is about bald eagles, and we love America because we love hot dogs, and that’s because hot dogs democratically contain a little of every animal.

So, what do we do when our own national symbol turns on the country that almost killed it off with pesticide?

Pot, kettle, color of nubian descent

Margaret Thatcher was never the most well-liked person in England. V For Vendetta was created as a response to her being in charge, and her conservative form of government was even given a name, Thatcherism, which in turn has been analogized to fascism (usually of the jack-booted thug type). The woman’s had an assassination attempt made against when no one cared about women enough to try to have them killed. More often than not, British contemporary stories about dystopic futures tend to originate thanks to her rule. She’s got quite a reputation.

So when she calls a person “a nut bag” and then gives out a snub, hoo boy, that says something. Especially when said person is Sarah Palin. It’s time for a Republican jihad against their own kind!

Koalas are moral degenerates

Of all the dangerous creatures in Australia, the koala bear ranks at pretty much the top. That’s why it’s called a bear. But there is good news for our Aussie allies in the War on Animals, the dreaded koala bear is slowly dying off.

In some areas of the country, koala populations have decreased by 80% since the 1990s, part of that is because we’ve been farming and taking away their homes, so they can’t threaten humans. But part of it is there own doing: Chlamydia.

Yes, that nasty bug you got your sophomore year is deadly to koalas, and they can’t help having unprotected sex with each other. What’s more, they are too dumb to cure it with antibiotics. Instead, they pass it along and doom their species. If only all our foes would be so kind!