Day: August 2, 2011

Eat My Sports: No Moss, señor

Get your 84 jerseys out, now promptly retire them. In one of the stranger stories of the NFL week, that I’m not sure I still believe yet, Randy Moss retired after 13 enigmatic, problematic and highlight-ridden seasons. Moss was the dream wide-out for the NFL, at 6-4 and a speed demon, he was a nightmare for defenders, when he tried.

You see, and there lies the problem with the storybook on Moss. He was the greatest receiver the NFL had ever seen, when he applied himself. Moss’ attitude allowed him to wast three and a half full years in which he could’ve easily put himself on-pace to catch Jerry Rice in some of the seemingly unattainable NFL receiving records. But Moss just didn’t care, and famously admitted to not trying. Continue reading Eat My Sports: No Moss, señor

Extinction only a hop, skip and jump away

Thanks to all those exhibitionists eating frog legs on dares, numerous frog species are now facing possible extinction.

It’s not from just the sheer number eaten–although that alone nearly wiped out frogs in India and Bangladesh back in those crazy, tasteless 1980s. Bullfrogs imported from Indonesia, China, Vietnam, Taiwan and Mexico carry chrytid fungus, which kills any native species they encounter.

Animal warriors, we’ve won this round, just so long as nobody figures out that there are easier animals to harvest that carry more meat and taste even more like chicken. (We’re talking about bunny rabbits, of course.)

Uncomfortably bringing about awareness

It’s the new rage! All the kids are doing it! Watch out for your cute little chickadee, as she’ll be joining in too! Even your mom and especially your sister!

That’s right, I’m clearly talking about the SlutWalk.

Hey, I didn’t make up the name and I certainly didn’t dress it up that way.

Groups of women have been gathering around to bring about awareness of the victims of sexual violence around the world through the only sensible way possible: Triumphantly marching around cities in high heels. Started in response to an off-color remark by a member of the Toronto police department, over the past three months, SlutWalks have begun happening around the world, with such locations as New Delhi, Toronto, Whale’s Vagina and Baltimore. The most recent event took place in Portland, gathering hundreds of … ladies? This is questioned as the article linked has a picture with a guy wearing a Captain America logo on it.

Just, hypothetically speaking: how much did this walk of sluts, no, tarts, NAY, strumpets (!) cost the city? Can we quantify that? In dollar amounts?

It’s Miley!

In news that really only matters if you care about a party in the USA, Miley Cyrus has created a Twitter war by tweeting pics of her new ink. Cyrus’ equal sign on her finger has sparked Twitter theology debates and a lashout by right wing extremist against the pop singer. That’s right, God, Twitter and Miley Cyrus in the same post.

Super-casual Monday cancelled

The financial markets have been a little jittery lately, and for good reason, what with the U.S. debt crisis and all. But on Wall Street yesterday, people were nervous for a slightly different reason: a bunch of naked people were running around.

As part of an art performance project (of course), dozens disrobed and walked around Wall Street near the New York Stock Exchange. Three of them got arrested.

Actual quote from a real person:

“It was like out of a porn movie,” said shocked street vendor Ali Wafaa, 27. “I wish New York City would always be like that.”

Mmmmm, someone’s stock is rising.