Day: August 11, 2011

MasterChugs Theater: ‘Election’

Has it crossed your mind that the morality play is a dead genre? Perhaps you’ve wondered what’s become of sharply-written satire?

Alexander Payne’s Election works as both.

First, though it’s over a decade old, its packaging feels modern, almost trendy. Not screechy and obnoxious like handfuls of other teen films currently being produced or peddled. Election‘s charm comes largely from its narrative technique: the audience gets the stories directly from the voice-overs of major characters. Hence we witness various perspectives that combine to create quite a jumbled unity. Payne, the director and co-writer, gives us digestible units that quicken pace and intensify plot. The result? We come away licking our lips, our appetites teased by the delicious ironies. Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: ‘Election’

Gay marriage advocates become their parents

Change.org has collected more than 5000 online signatures to petition Sesame Street to marry off long-time eligible bachelors Bert and Ernie.* The armchair activists believe that showing children a partnership fraught with fights and bubble baths could teach them that it’s OK to be gay … just so long as you do it right and get married.

The common law marriage will hopefully put an end to questions about the two Muppets’ sexual orientation, just like the Bachmanns.’

*If the two aren’t married, the petitioners would be happy if Sesame Street introduces a transgender character, a void which has already been filled by Oscar’s hermaphroditic earthworm friend, Slimey.

Maybe our countries aren’t so different

For years, people have labeled cops into two categories: The ones in shape, and the ones that are horribly out of shape, and when we mean out of shape, brother, these men create their own shapes. Okay, so, maybe people have labeled cops in more than just those two categories, but for the purpose of this post, let’s just go with the above.

BUT, we may have now found our new across the globe brother in arms: New Delhi. Five policemen recently died on the job. The cause of death? Heart attacks in all, apparently happening while the guys were taking part in a physical fitness test required to be promoted.

So, I guess that’d place under the latter of the two categories that we mentioned earlier: The ones that are horribly out of shape. Right? Maybe not so much. While…

Most of those competing in the race were in their mid-40s and were described as “middle aged and unfit”….

and…

the constables who died had been suffering from heart complaints and high blood pressure but either “did not inform the department of their ailments or they were not themselves aware of the disease”.

It might be safe to say that New Delhi doesn’t F around with having officers that are in shape:

A further 100 officers fainted during the trial in which they had to run 10 kilometres in less than ninety minutes in high monsoon temperatures.

Clearly, New Delhi cops are like the Wu Tang Clan.

Keypeng up wif da Kardashians

Ladies and gentlemen, your literary concerns over what to read next are over! Because everyone’s frontrunners for who they want to pen a novel actually are, that’s right, the Kardashians. So far they have regailed us with stories of whether Kim’s buttocks are real, or whether or not Khloe and Lamar Odom’s marriage will make it until halftime, and now, we get to read their literary concept.

Way to go Seacrest.

Nuking your food

Richard Handl, a Swedish man bought some smoke detectors, some clock parts and radium. No big deal, really. He even posted his progress on his Facebook page.

Then, one day, the Swedish police came knocking, and arrested him. As it turns out, it’s not legal there to build a nuclear reactor in your kitchen. He had even acquired americum, radium, beryllium and 96 percent sulphuric acid, which we assume are science-y things needed to build said reactor.

So for those of you writing down the lessons you learn from SG, if you’re going to build a nuclear reactor in your home, avoid documenting it online.