Day: September 19, 2011

The McBournie Minute: Things in Netflux

This mornin’ I got an e-mail from Reed Hastings, the CEO of Netflix. He had some apologzin’ to do and apparently he decided to contact me directly. So he said he was sorry about all the confusin’ and fuss surrounding his company’s price increase. But don’t worry, he’s still upping the prices anyway.

But he had more announcements, fer me, too. Apparently he’s plannin’ to spin off the DVD mailing service from the video streaming service. They be namin’ the DVD mailing service “Qwikster,” because let’s face it, we need more annoyingly-titled companies out there.

And yet, it’s still a crappy move. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Things in Netflux

Downloadin’ a PETA ass

Ahoy, mateys! Everyone knows a pirate’s best friend on a long voyage be his right hand, unless it’s a hook and then it’s the left. To cash in on this, PETA will be launching a pornographic Web site once the .xxx domain be available come Decemberrrr.

The site will feature buxom lasses doing wenchy things, followed by graphic footage of animal abuse. The Guys think this be a fine plan, PETA, if ye goal be to train the next generation of Internet masturrrrbators to maintain erections during animal suffering.

(Special thanks to ye, Nyssa 23!)

Lifestyles of the Rich & Vodka Drunkenski

Ahoy! It be the same situation that we’ve all heard ere: a chat show be televised. Russian billionaires be asked to be on the show. Eurasian Mooooooonspeak is uttered and five -ski’s later, three sounds are heard:

  • The first sound be a swing across the face
  • The second sound be another swing across the face
  • The third sound be the victim tumbling o’er the stage

If you be familiar with the situation, it’s probably because you’re Alexander Lebedev, former KGB agent turned Russian billionaire turned professor of the sweet science. Or, you’re Sergei Polonsky, former property developer turned punch victim. Or, you be simply a person that be leading an incredibly odd life that we be fixing to document.