Day: March 14, 2012

Take it from Snee: Explaining U.S. political parties to foreigners, children

Longtime readers may recall that for three glorious days back in 2008, I was a legal subject of Her Royal Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II (long may she reign so that Camilla may not). Bermuda was a welcome vacation from the U.S. because it was an election year, but alas, the natives knew all about it and would ask tourists who we’re going to vote for.

What was most striking was that, although they knew the names, they still didn’t quite grasp the subtleties or history behind the American political parties or why one American would support one over another.

It is in the spirit of not knowing what a Tory or Socialist is that I’ve assembled this handy guide to the great and small political parties of these United States for foreigners and children. (For best use, please print this out onto a 4 x 11-inch note card, and keep it in your wallet with a magnifying glass.) Continue reading Take it from Snee: Explaining U.S. political parties to foreigners, children

It’s a trap, older ladies!

The Transportation Security Administration has announced that it will ease up screening procedures on seniors aged 75 and above. Much in the same way they’ve done for kids 12 and under, TSA will no longer force the elderly to remove their shoes or outerwear at security checkpoints, and they will now be able to opt out of pat-downs provided they submit to a second no-touch screening.

But, just when TSA thinks they’ve found a way to improve their perception problem, they introduce a whole new one: passenger ages will be determined by a screener’s visual assessment. Unless … maybe it’s a trap to compliment grandmas, like carding older ladies for booze?

Are you a man or a rapist?

We can only assume that’s the way Courtney Love feels the Oscar-winning song from The Muppets should be titled. That’s right, Courtney Love has decided to arise in the world once more, this time shouting the dreaded r-word (resplendent?) from the high heavens in the direction of Jim Henson’s lovable creations.

2011’s The Muppets had the indignity – no, the sheer gall – to use Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” during its run-time without asking Love if they could! Doing so was nothing short of raping her!

Except for one small thing:

Love sold half of her rights to Cobain’s catalog to Primary Wave Music, and that this company not only approved the use of the song, but it also secured the approval of the song’s co-writers Krist Novoselic and Dave Grohl

Oh. Courtney, maybe you should go back to that hole in the wall you were living in.

In here, you’re fired

Olive Garden is just rolling in free publicity lately. First it was an elderly North Dakota woman on the restaurant beat, now it’s arena football.

The Pittsburgh Power, an Arena Football League team, was fired during the pre-game dinner at Olive Garden in Orlando, Florida. Turns out it was a labor dispute, and the AFL players’ union was set to strike before the season-opener anyway, but the management beat them to the punch. Players walked out mid-announcement. On top of that, the now-former players had to find their own way home, or leave the union and come back to the team for a free trip.

Going to Disney World doesn’t work out for everyone.