The McBournie Minute: Babies are ruining politics

The presidential campaign season continues to drag on, and it’s especially evident for those living in the Washington, D.C. area. Here, you really can’t escape politics not just because it’s the federal capital, but because there are so damn many people here who are into politics, mostly because they either work for the government itself or a lobby group.

The only upside is that no one really campaigns in the greater Washington area. The people in the city proper hold about as much political sway as Puerto Rico, and those who live in the suburbs are typically imports from another area, and very commonly, again, working for the government or a lobby group. That means I get spared most of the campaigning. But it’s hard to avoid it all. There are rallies, sometimes a speech, and then there is the strangest tradition of all: kissing babies.

What is it with politicians and their obsession with our youngest Americans? Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Babies are ruining politics

Viking mice and the Germans who crush them

In the War on Animals, no foe is too small. And science reinforced that fact with a new study, proving the existence of Viking house mice.

Yes, Viking house mice. Mice that traveled with Vikings to sack most of coastal Europe. And now that we know about them, what can possibly stop them?

Fortunately, we have that answer: German journalists.

Yes, Gernalists. Germany’s trusted 4th estate also knows how to clean house when it comes to small mammals. One German cameraman was able to infiltrate the enclosure of an earless bunny rabbit that was destined for fame and crush it, presumably with a jackboot. And another rising star, a squirrel named Cinderella, was trampled by a German television reporter.

We’re ready for the History channel and Animal Planet to produce a crossover special.

Knockout performance

No one goes to a karaoke bar to hear good music. We all go because it sounds like a laugh, and after a few drinks, that microphone looks mighty tempting. Unfortunately, some people just can’t take criticism.

At an Applebee’s in Florida, one man was so bad that customers wanted him to stop. (Also, apparently in Florida they have karaoke at Applebee’s.) The restaurant manager turned off the music, and was immediately punched out by the performer. Amazingly enough, a police officer was eating in the restaurant and arrested the man.

We still don’t know what he was charged with, nor what song he was attempting to sing.