Day: December 18, 2012

Eat My Sports: Running with purpose

If any of you have been paying attention to the NFL this season, you know one thing, it’s been a year for comebacks. Peyton Manning of course has been the big story, but one Adrian Peterson has been the most remarkable.

We are still under a year from seeing Peterson crippled on FedEx Field in Marylans, and with Peterson on pace to break the single season rushing mark, watching him play this season has been absolutely amazing, and watching him run wit purpose and determination is something you don’t get a whole lot anymore in sports. Continue reading Eat My Sports: Running with purpose

Cost of feeding pigeons may go up, up, UP!

If you can cut off the lines of supply for the enemy in war, you can starve them out and nearly win the war in one fell swoop. One Chicago alderman is now using that line of thinking (we assume) to end the verminous scourge that is pigeons and we wholeheartedly support it!

James Cappelman is proposing to make it a majorly punishable crime to feed pigeons. Serial offenders could face up to a grand in a fine and six months in jail. We couldn’t be happier for this to pass, as doing so would not only strike a blow against our foes, but also clean up a major metropolitan city of our nation. Win-win!

Cappelman, you have all our SeriouslyGuys’ lobbying support! Oh, what’s that? We can’t lobby for you. No problem. You have our spiritual support instead.

Rudolph’s a drunk

"I'm a shameful reminder of your prenatal substance abuse!"
“I’m a shameful reminder of your 1960s prenatal substance abuse!”

According to the annual fun holiday issue of BMJ (formerly The British Medical Journal), Rudolph’s nose is red due to an abundance of blood cells. And if you ever saw them through thermal imagery equipment, you would even say they glow.

And you know who else has a red nose due to blood cells? Drunks. So, really we should be celebrating that Rudolph managed to carve a niche for himself in polar society and gain meaningful employment in spite of his fetal alcohol syndrome. Isn’t that right, Mrs. Donner?

There must always be a stout in Winterfell

HBO’s hit show Game of Thrones, and the book series it is fashioned after, has established quite the loyal following, so it’s time to cash in. The obvious choice would be GOT mobile games, but HBO zigged instead. Introducing Game of Thrones beer.

Brewery Ommegang in Cooperstown, N.Y. will be brewing Iron Throne Blonde Ale in time for the season three, with more brews sure to come. They should come with a warning that if you consume more than two, every brown-haired, bearded white guy on the show looks the same.

Really, HBO? Why not start with a Boardwalk Empire bathtub gin? Or a True Blood red wine? Any beverage associated with The Newsroom would have to just be a hangover, as the drink happened a while ago and we can now see the consequences of it.