March is upon us for another year, which means, as always, I break out the baddies. Because I’m apparently something of a masochist, I’ve decided to see how quickly I can bring down my mood from a good event thanks to the movie I’m watching.
Early reports via From Justin to Kelly, the American Idol movie from 2003, show that this will be very successful. Sigh. Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: “From Justin To Kelly”
Thousands of sharks are making their way to Floridian beaches in anticipation of Spring Break, lured by the promise of tasty, inebriated young morsels.
While many of the sharks are also taking a break from their schools, for some, this is an annual ritual spanning decades. On-site polling of Spring Break veterans reveal that most enjoy the shrinking of the bathing suit over the past 80 years; but a small minority long for more modest days when there weren’t tiny straps that get caught between rows of teeth.
But despite those changes, nearly all sharks agree that Spring Break is the best week of the year, followed closely by what they call “Discovery Week,” when thousands of camera men are lowered into snack cages.
This is SeriouslyGuys, reporting from the front line of the War on Animals. Thanks for reading.
We’ve seen all kinds of things spill out on the roads over the years. Chickens, monkeys, sausages, beer, cheese, heck, I’m pretty sure I’ve even heard of back-ups being created due to the overflow of pirated movies across an interstate in at least one country.
Legos is a new one for us, though. Especially in West Virginia.
Not so much because they’re a creative toy and West Virginia is full of stupid people that inexplicably burn couches, but because … no, that’s probably why.
It’s nearly March, or Mental Illness Month, which is the perfect time to remember why Duke University is the worst school in the world.
When the students come back from spring break later this semester, their asses will feel better. That’s right, the school is switching from rough one-ply toilet paper to softer two-ply due to student complaints. Dookies are so entitled that they think that college toilet paper is supposed to be comfortable.
When The Guys were in college, the toilet paper was comparable to sandpaper. Nothing is more effective than sanding away the dingleberries.
