He (may have) stole the cookies from the cookie jar!

And by “cookie jar,” we still mean “large and unmarked warehouse.”

Remember that grand theft of the Girl Scout cookies? You know, the one that was only fifty percent worth it because half of the contents stolen were of the Shortbread variety (yum) and the other half were of the Thin Mint variety (ugh)?

Surprise, surprise: it was an inside job. Well, “inside job” meaning from within the warehouse, not from within the Girl Scouts. Christopher Morton, accused of the theft, has not said why he allegedly decided to steal almost $19,000 worth of cookies, including his horrible choice to grab $9,500 worth of Thin Mints.