You Missed It: Beyond belief edition

Even you, Capt. Picard, you French space-atheist, you.
Even you, Capt. Picard, you French space-atheist, you.

You’re probably on your way to somewhere cool you’re going to spend your Memorial Day weekend right now. If that’s true, you’re almost certainly not reading this, but if it is true, and you’re driving, put me down. Not in the verbally-abusive way, I mean stop reading. I admire your eagerness to read, but let’s face it, I’ve got a pretty good buzz going at this point. I’m operating at about 70%. If you were busy checking out a huge Lego X-Wing in Times Square this week, odds are you missed it.

All good atheists go to Heaven
This week, Pope Francis said during a Mass that anyone, including atheists, can get to Heaven be doing good works during their time on Earth. The pope suggested that everyone, not just Catholics, can lead good lives. This sparked a significant debate about whether non-believers should be let in St. Peter’s pearly gates. You know who’s not part of the debate? Atheists.

Back to Paris
The wait is over. After a break from the studio for seven years, Paris Hilton announced she is working a new house music album to be released this summer. If that news makes you question if God exists, don’t worry, Pope Francis says you can still get to Heaven.

BSA puts the ‘out’ in ‘scouts’
Boy Scouts of America’s national council voted to allow gay scouts to scout, but gay scout leaders can’t lead scouts because of cooties. The decision was criticized by the more conservative members of the organization, which see the decision as a violation of BSA’s moral code. Conservative congregations have threatened to pull funding for their local Boy Scout troops, especially the churches whose pastors have secret gay boyfriends.

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