I’m no film critic, and people don’t follow how I point my thumb. What I am is a comic book fanboy of more than 25 years. And for me, Man of Steel is the Superman movie I’ve always wanted to see, but never thought I would.
So yeah, I liked it.
A warning: this will be a long and slightly spoiler-y review. Continue reading MasterChugs Theater: ‘Man of Steel’
Possibly in response to a joke we made about the volume of waiter piss in their escargot, the Paris chamber of commerce and the regional tourism committee are now concerned that their trademark snootiness could send potential visitors to rival romantic locations like London or Amsterdam.
So, they’ve published a booklet entitled Do you speak Touriste? with hopes that it will nip Frenchness in the bourgeon. The booklet suggests greeting tourists in their preferred languages, including German with hands raised high. Other culturally specific tips include calling British people by their first name and assuring Americans that 300 Euros is totally reasonable for a bottle of water.
And if you’re cancelling travel plans to France because you expected their world-class disdain, you could always try New York. They have the common courtesy to piss on you and leave your snails alone.
Normally, terrorism isn’t exactly something that should probably be joked around about. That said, when the accused culprit in question has created a mad scientist device, perhaps it should be brought up?
If your initial plan to manipulate Jewish people into being arrested fails and your next thought is create a Dr. Mindbender level device, you’re no longer the FBI’s most wanted, you’re now Super Villain Numero Uno.
The alien war may be triggered by our own stupid tweets, but it’s secretly underway already. And it’s all an English politician’s fault.
A member of the Whitby, England Town Council by the name of Simon Parkes is married and has three kids. But on top of that he’s got another kid with an alien being he likes to call the Cat Queen. Parkes said that he has sex with the alien about four times a year — on a spaceship, of course. What’s worse, he says his own mother is an alien.
Parkes probably thinks he’s saving the human race by f&$%ing his way out of trouble, but really he’s putting us all in danger by creating an alien-human hybrid race to spy on us and figure out our weaknesses. This is bad.
