Chicago commuters cope with cold with alligators, nudity

People of Chicago, be careful on your commutes. The temperature is cooling down and things are getting weird.

A few weeks ago, a baby alligator was found waltzing around the baggage claim area of Chicago O’Hare International Airport. The gator wasn’t talking, so authorities were forced to go through surveillance footage. They found that a woman riding on the train to the airport was playing with the creature in the middle of the night, now they’re looking for her.

Then on Saturday, another woman got on another transit authority train line completely naked. Naturally, she called herself the “goddess of the train” and as any vengeful goddess would, she yelled at and slapped the mere humans in her presence until the police took her away.