Day: December 10, 2013

For those of you who haven’t been paying attention to the NFL this season, the Denver Broncos have been pretty good at football. Led by Peyton Manning, this year’s Denver team seems to be living by the mantra “if you want to beat us, score 50.” Manning, unlike year’s past, has been playing surprisingly well in the cold, where the  knock used to be, unless you got him in a dome in the playoffs, you could beat him in cold weather, i.e.: New England, Pittsburgh, Denver?

This “new” Manning has gone against everything I’ve ever seen from him in the elements since I started watching him at Tennessee. This has me thinking that either he went to Denver to face down his fears and learn to play in the cold, specifically to beat Tom Brady in it so he could cement the title of “greatest quarterback of all-time,” or, Manning went D.C. Comics “Bizzaro World” fashion, and became the evil version of himself in some sort of devil pact (note: Evil Manning is a Bill Simmons creation, but he’s just talking about how he looks in his new NFL mugshot, I think he flipped to the dark side). Continue reading Eat My Sports: Evil Manning facing down demons

Researchers have recently found success treating menstrual cramps with Viagra.

To clarify: they gave the Viagra to the women with the cramps. No doctors earned their red wings in the name of science today … that we know of.

So, how do boner pills treat pelvic pain? Sildenafil, the less sexy name of the medicine marketed as Viagra, merely increases blood flow to what doctors call the crotchular region, regardless of how far your sensitive parts dangle. So, the increased blood flow to the uterus seems to clear up whatever causes dysmenorrhea during periods.

So far, the treatment has worked better than the placebo with no side effects. Well, aside from women having trouble answering math problems in front of the class.

La cucaracha! La cucaracha! Es más fuerte que tú! La cucaracha! La cucaracha! Vamos a necesitar un fuerte resfriado!

I’m about to tell you something that’s unheard of and completely shocking: there are immigrants in New York City.

No, really. Somehow, an Asian species of cockroach has immigrated into the United States. Yes, more cockroaches are always bad, but it’s worse this time, as this species is slightly more resistant to the cold temperatures than you’d think.

What’s this mean? We need the old vermin to take out the new vermin so that we can kill the old vermin before they take on the adaptive traits of the new vermin.

It should go without saying that this is a bad time of year to be outdoors, but consider this a reminder that you’re never safe from animals, even as winter creeps closer.

A woman in Virgina thought she was safe while jogging at night, when suddenly, a deer fell on her. Apparently, the deer was struck by a car, went airborne, then came down on the path beside the road, and the jogger.

Both the driver and the jogger were taken to the hospital, the flying deer escaped authorities.