Day: August 6, 2014

As another football season looms (or even cross-stitches) on the end of the month, Washington Redskins fans — including yours truly — find ourselves experiencing the usual dread/cautious optimism that accompanies every year. We have a new coach. RGIII is allegedly healthy. The receiving corps looks good on paper.

But, as if there wasn’t enough hype about what will be different this year (and yet somehow end the same as every previous year since 1991), there’s even more hype about what won’t be changing: the owner and the team name.

And yet, somehow, Dan Snyder has managed to turn the Washington Redskins fan base into a “grassroots” army for keeping their name — which is the subject of a lawsuit by actual Native Americans and not just some issue du jour by the Liberal Keyboard Civil Liberties Union.

So, here’s the question Washington fans need to ask ourselves: are we really thinking and acting in our favorite team’s best interest by ever siding with Dan Snyder? Let’s explore Snyder’s latest moves for why we’re stupid if we can say “yes” with a straight face.

Continue reading Take it from Snee: You sure you want to side with Dan Snyder?

There’s a war going on and you might not have even known. Like the North and the South, the Yankees and the Red Sox, the cowboys and the Indians, the Autobots and the Decepticons, even the adult male fans of My Little Pony and the rest of the world, two sides simply hate each other: cream puffs and Big Dentistry.

For eons untold, the battle between the dessert pastry and the men behind mouth masks and that curved pointy tool has waged between our teeth, around our gums and in our nerve endings. But now, new locations have been selected: West Allis and Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Delta Dental has bought and put up a billboard in Milwaukee proclaiming that the start of a cavity tastes awfully similar to a cream puff. Some feel the ads is not that coincidental, given that at the same time, in West Allis, the Wisconsin State Fair is taking, home of the Wisconsin State Fair cream puff. Delta states that the billboards will come down in a week or two, but the PR damage might have been already done. Cleaning shots fired!

Folks, we’re smarter than animals. Let’s face it, besides the fact that we have all the guns, it’s all that’s keeping the beasts from overthrowing us tomorrow. But now, scientists are teaching them how to use our technology.

Researchers in England have been studying how red-footed tortoises use touch-screen devices. (Caution: Autoplaying video.) They have demonstrated that tortoises can learn where to touch the screen in order to get a strawberry.

This an appalling abuse of science. We shouldn’t be teaching animals how to use tablets. Just imagine how angry birds will be when they find out we’re playing Angry Birds.