We won’t back down. As we move closer and closer to the holiday season, our wartime enemies, the animal kingdom, attempt to throw everything at us. Because of their lack of opposable thumbs and indoor heating, animals are not able to survive the winter, with the exception of a select few of their specialized troops, giving us the advantage.
Reptiles are the first of their warriors to go down. Given their cold-blooded bodies, it of course makes sense that they’d throw their largest warriors in a last-ditch attempt, and they did just that over the weekend in Lakeland, Florida. A local man was able to dispatch a 12 foot long, over 700 pound monster alligator. It may not be hold the record for the largest or heaviest alligator in the state, but Lakeland residents will be able to sleep soundly knowing that they won’t have to contend with such a horrific beast.
What I tell you next, though, may put you through an emotional roller coaster. Almost two months ago, an Arkansas girl was involved in an accident that saw a deer come through opposing traffic and place itself through her driver’s side window, impaling her through her jaws with its antlers. It’s a terrifying event to happen. We’re proud and overjoyed to say that now, Tori Henry has nearly fully recovered, with simply a small scar to show. Even better, that villainous deer is dead and no more.
Take that, nature.