Illinois is not a normal place.
Every year at the Lake County Fair, people flock to the “Banana Derby.” A race in which capuchin monkeys dressed as jockeys ride dogs. That’s not the weird part. The weird part is that there are people out there who want to end the derby for some reason. Animal rights activists are circulating an online petition calling for the cancellation of the race. For once, a county fair features something other than rickety rides, creepy carnies and fried everything. The fair has something that people want to see, and some jerks want to ruin the fun.
We are in control of the Earth, and that includes animals. To make sure these beasts know their place, we should be humiliating them for our entertainment. Ride on, monkey jockeys.