The McBournie Minute: NFL mustaches don’t donate to Movember

Halloween has come and gone, and if you’re friends with Rick Snee or Bryan Schools on Facebook, you are well aware that it’s Movember. Yes, it’s that month where some of us pretend that mustaches are cool so we can raise awareness about … something involving dudes and health. It used to be man cancers, and now it seems like various things that affect men’s health.

I’m a dude, so dude health is way up there on my list of priorities. So I guess I have to be on the side of this vague cause. And if you know a guy and are concerned about his health, you should support it, too.

The problem is that groups like the NFL use it to just make a quick buck.

In October, the NFL makes teams incorporate pink into their uniforms because it’s breast cancer awareness month, and the NFL wants to look like it takes breast cancer very seriously. You see, the NFL knows that it’s about as expanded into the American male demographic as it’s going to get. So it’s reaching out for an entire month to women by supporting a lady issue everyone can get behind: ending domestic abuse sexual assault breast cancer.

When you buy a pink jersey or whatever from the NFL, little of that money actually goes to anything related to breast cancer. In fact, none of it goes toward breast cancer research. What little does go toward something other than paying people is spent on health facilities that are within 100 miles of a city with an NFL team. This is the only possible reason why the Tennessee Titans exist.

And it’s even worse for Movember. Let me drop some scary knowledge on you. The vast majority of people involved in the NFL are men. In fact, nearly every single player on the field today is a man. Men also represent more than half of all mustaches in the world today, and you’ll see quite a few of them on the gridiron.

Yet outwardly, the NFL does nothing to support Movember. You won’t see anything about it on You’ll never buy a mustachioed jersey of your favorite player for $250. Players must endorse the charity on their own behalf. The NFL seems eerily quite on testicular cancer. The only balls it seems concerned about are Tom Brady’s.

But with the leagues indifference to the injuries its players receive, especially the long-term effects of repeated concussions, it shouldn’t shock us that the NFL doesn’t care about men’s health.