Eat My Sports: The Exorcism of Derrick Rose

One of my biggest problems as a sports fan, and I think a lot of people come across this problem when their teams continually find epic ways to suck, is I am a sports masochist. Specifically, in my lifetime, it has been being a fan of the New York Knicks.

In the past 16 years it has been one embarrassment after another. Whether it was the truly awesome experience of having Stephon Marbury (one of two professional athletes I can name with a tattoo on their face, but at least Mike Tyson is funny), the relentless overpaying of past their prime ballhogs, or the mortgaging of over five years worth of draft picks to get Carmelo Anthony when he was going to be a free agent later in the year anyways.

Simply put, the New York Knicks keep finding even worse ways to make you feel optimistic. Enter Derrick Rose.

Once upon a time and 8,987,346,043 knee surgeries ago, Rose was the brightest surging start in the NBA, a league MVP, and the leader of the only team in the East that could pose a threat to the Super Friends Heat. But that was then, and this is now. Rose, is a shell of himself, and a shell of his knees, has no explosiveness and as the facilitator of the offense can only muster up a measly four assists per game.

When the Knicks traded for Rose in the offseason, it felt horrible to begin with. The team traded draft picks for someone who is going to be released after the season. I get the train of thought for getting a former MVP, but … no one thought the marriage would work.

And now it officially hasn’t.

Last night it was announced that Brandon “Mr. Brick Shot” Jennings would be starting in  place of Rose because the team could not locate him or get in touch with him. Immediately, this didn’t pass the smell test, and a day later the “family issue” excuse doesn’t seem to feel any better.

Add to the fact that Rose is coming off a extremely sketchy sexual assault case, the Knicks need to distance themselves from their latest embarrassment while they still can. It’s not often you can cut and run from things while you still can, but 38 games and two embarrassing episodes later, the Knicks need to move on.