The only way to win the War on Animals is to make sure we don’t fight the same enemies over and over again. Once we put an enemy combatant in lock-down, then we had better make sure they stay there. And yet here we are, watching non-profit animal cuddlers trying to lure a fugitive bobcat back into its cell.
Ollie, a 25-pound bobcat, escaped from the National Zoo sometime Monday morning and is wandering free through our nation’s capital. This tiger-adjacent predator has access to the very strip clubs that our legislators and lobbyists depend on for nightly glitter-coatings that are essential for effective policy-making.
And what’s the taxpayer-funded zookeepers’ plan? To offer up food until she moseys back into her pen: “‘We very much believe that she will want to come back to her habitat,’ [zoo official Brandie] Smith says.”
See? This is why we have to silence the national parks and other sciencey-types. If they’re not with us, they’re against us.