Ask your local terror provider for ‘Al-Qaeda’

They may be officially called “adhesive bandages,” but no matter who makes ’em, we still call them “Bandaids.” It’s not a tissue, it’s a “Kleenex.” We didn’t hold up the liquor store with an “assault rifle,” we used our trusty “Kalashnikov.”

And, as demonstrated by our invasion of Iraq, the U.S. doesn’t respond to “terror,” but to “Al-Qaeda.”

However, if your local terror provider didn’t carry that brand of Al-Qaeda terror we’ve grown to fear and trust, then have we got news for you: the Kings of Dramedy (“It’s funny and sad because it’s true!) are going into syndication to help spread their brand into previously untapped markets.

That’s right: if you’ve had to put up with generic Taliban (more like “Talibland“) and Lashkar-i-Taiba (more like “Lashkar-i-Suck“) terrorism, then don’t despair! Namebrand terror is on its way!