Are you tired of being bossed around by commercials? Don’t you wish you didn’t have to switch beer brands just because an ad made you horny or laugh? Now there’s a way to mindlessly watch commercials without losing self-control and consumer choice: popcorn.
A recent set of experiments indicates that, when exposed to a new product name in advertising, we simulate its pronunciation with our mouths. Unless our yaps are full of popcorn. Then we’re unable to remember it later, which means we just spent the past 30 seconds chomping, chewing, unproductively tonguing at bits of corn skin between our teeth and simply watching the bright, shiny colors pass before us, undigested (just like the un-popped kernels).
So, be clever while looking like a cow: buy Orville Reddenbacher’s new Ad-Blocker Popping Kernals today.