Category: Booze News

| Filed under Booze News

Kid approved, drunk hangover not approved

Are you drunk? Do you have a hangover? Are you staying in the Panama City Beach Holiday Inn? Is it Spring Break for you?

Well, hopefully, you’ve gotten to the 10 am brunch because, if you’re still asleep, prepare to wake up to the soothing sounds of Elton John crooning about lions getting busy.

Brunch has never been more important.

| Filed under Booze News, It Must Be Science!

Finally, you can enjoy a martini in space

If you’ve always dreamed of drinking in space, science is here to help.

A company called Cosmic Lifestyle Corp. has designed cocktail glasses they say will work in zero gravity. The cups look sort of like what glasses we know here on Earth, but they’ve got a system of grooves that the company says will hold the liquids more or less in place until you’re ready to put them in your face. Like any foolish endeavor, the zero gravity cups are doing a Kickstarter funding campaign.

Beats drinking out of those lame Capri Sun-style packets.

| Filed under Booze News, It Must Be Science!

Space yeast has come to Earth to give us beer

In the quest for a new gimmick, brewers keep looking to the stars.

We’ve seen beer brewed from grains grown in space, we’ve seen beer brewed with moon dust, and we’ve even seen attempts to brew beer in space. Now, it’s time for the next giant leap in drinking until you feel weightless: space yeast.

Oregon’s Ninkasi Brewing has launched vials of yeast into space, then retrieved them, and come up with an imperial stout. While this brings space beer to new heights, the real accomplishment is that the company refrained from saying that the beer is “out of this world.”

| Filed under Booze News

Drink yourself sexy

If you’ve had a couple in today’s revelry, you may be the most attractive person in the bar, according to a new study.

Researchers found that if a person has a glass or two of wine, their image is more attractive to other people than if they were sober. Unfortunately, this doesn’t mean double-fisting makes you sexy, it means that subtle changes in your appearance after a drink or two (read: a smile) makes you more attractive. Another downside is that if you’ve had more than a couple drinks, your attractiveness goes down.

No research has been done on whether it goes back up again after 8 or 9 drinks. So, let’s just assume for now it really does help.

| Filed under Booze News

Palcohol is here unless you’re there

Remember Palcohol? Almost a year ago, we told you about the product, how it got approved, then unapproved and then made temptingly unsexy by its creator.

Well guess what? It’s back! Unless you live in a fifth of the states here in the U.S. Then your nose is just boned for regular reasons.

Palcohol has, once again, been approved by the Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau. Four varieties can now be bought! Except approximately 10 states aren’t down with getting your alcohol buzz via your nose, so they’ve already or are planning to halt sales in their respective residences.

Mind you, all of The Guys live in the same state, and at the moment, our state has not banned Palcohol. This just made the SeriouslyGuys Fantasy Football draft that much more snortier.

| Filed under Booze News, Facepalm

Secret Service still the best at taking shots

Armstrong Barriers: Secret Service-tested, president-approved.
Armstrong Barriers: Secret Service-tested, Jack Daniels-approved.

Two U.S. Secret Service agents reportedly collided their car into a White House barrier Wednesday night. According to House Oversight Committee Chairman Jason Chaffetz (R-UT), the agents were partying in Georgetown to celebrate a Secret Service spokesman’s retirement (too soon, apparently) until called back to respond to an incident at the White House.

Alcohol is suspected as a factor, which isn’t much of a secret considering that these are the same barriers that the Secret Service set up in the first place. At this point, the only secret that the Secret Service has kept protected is that they graduated from the police academy back when Commandant Lassard was in charge of it.

In other news: The Guys are definitely becoming U.S. Secret Service agents.

| Filed under Booze News

Civil War wine tasted like seawater, apparently

If you were looking forward to trying out some wine from the Civil War, you can give up now.

A panel of wine tasters sampled one of five bottles recovered from a ship that sank in 1864 bound for the South. It was pretty much just seawater, which shouldn’t be shocking, considering that the liquid was milky and grey.

At this point we should just stop getting excited about booze recovered from shipwrecks, especially if the bottles are sealed with corks that allow in seawater. Centuries from now, people will enjoy screw-top and bag wines from modern shipwrecks.

| Filed under Booze News, It Must Be Science!

Shipwreck beer was actually kind of weak

Hey, remember that beer that was probably the oldest ever found? The one from the shipwreck in the Baltic? Scientists now have a better idea of what it tasted like.

Since you probably don’t have the cash to spend on a brewery’s re-creation of the brew, it’s imagination time. Using chemical analysis and other techniques, researchers found that it was an amber ale, and it had an ABV of about 4.5%, which isn’t really the strength you’d think would be imported from a faraway land. Because the bacteria was still alive inside the bottle, scientists were even able to tell what kind of hops were used, but probably knew better than to list it, so they didn’t come off as beer snobs.

Just grab something barrel-aged for this weekend. It will cost you less, and it will still be a trip back in time.

| Filed under Booze News, War on Animals

Animals and their human allies ruin a London bar

If you’re in London this month, you’re probably excited about Annie the Owl, a pop up bar that will be open for only one week. You are also probably a crazy person.

The draw of the bar is that you get to drink with owls. For those of you who don’t know, owls are huge, scary birds that can see you in the dark, and have long talons that could slice you up in a fraction of a second. A place filled with these flying death machines seems like a good place to drink, doesn’t it?

Now, the bar has cut the service of all alcohol in response to concerns from animal rights groups. So you can’t even enjoy the bar for the reason you’re there: to get drunk.

| Filed under Booze News, It Must Be Science!

Fight dementia with beer today

Drinking is good for you. And if you drink, there’s a good chance you’ll remember that fact long into your old age.

According to researchers in China, a chemical in beer helps ward off degenerative diseases. A study found that xanthohumol, a chemical found in hops, might help brain cells from oxidative stress that can lead to dementia. That means that while you may not remember how many beers you had last night, there’s a better chance you’ll remember your grandchildren’s names later in life.

And yet our own Rick Snee doesn’t like hoppy beers. So if he starts posting jokes from 2008, just roll with it.