We’re certain that President Obama will be welcome to stay as long as he likes, contrary to however Higgins feels about it. And, should he ever get kicked out, he can crash at Rick’s Cafe American, which will most likely be run by Joe Biden by that point.
Pat Martin told the House of Commons that he accidentally bought underwear a size too small, and he bought a lot because they were half price. The problem is that it’s uncomfortable for him to sit down. That’s exactly why John Boehner goes commando.
Hundreds of his followers in the western city of Rajkot donated funds for a temple that features a seated statue of Modi and is topped out with a wind gauge shaped like a lotus, the symbol of his Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP).
Modi stated for the record that he was appalled and that “This is shocking and against India’s great traditions. Building such temples is not what our culture teaches us.”
“Besides,” he added, “It’s not like I’m Ronald Reagan.”
Sick of election coverage yet? Too bad, we got one more story for you! Luckily this doesn’t involve anything that actually matters. In fact, it’s in Indiana, the very center of where nothing happens.
Richard Yencer’s campaign for Yorktown, Indiana town council came to a crashing halt on Tuesday when, according to authorities, he hit an opponent with his car as the man was putting up signs at a polling site. Yencer then drove across a yard to escape. Police caught up with him later that day at another polling site. He’d been wanted for stealing political signs just a day before.
The mid-term election campaign that ended yesterday was one of the most expensive in American history, and no one even cared about it. Just imagine how much worse it will be in two years! But the spending is nothing compared to what we spend on beer.
Lawyers for Texas Gov. Rick Perry began court proceedings with an interesting argument to dismiss charges of abuse of power: he couldn’t have done it because he’s not a king or emperor.
A Texas Governor is not Augustus traversing his realm with a portable mint and an imperial treasure in tow; he no more has custody or possession of the State’s general revenue funds than does any Texan. No governor can say of his or her state what the Sun King said of France: ‘L’etat c’est moi.’
Case closed. If the crown does not fit, then you must acquit.
Austrian politics aren’t like American politics. They’re just not.
The country’s Socialist party put up garden gnomes that look like they want a fist bump around lamp posts ahead of elections in western Austria. These things also look to me about two and a half feet tall, just to add extra creepiness. And then, someone stole them.
A total of 400 gnomes, valued at $4,000 combined, have been stolen. Either that, or they came to live and walked away.
There’s a whole bunch of elections coming up for Congress this fall, but who cares? Let’s focus on the elections that matter.
There was a time when Times Square was a seedy place, a place you didn’t want to take your children because of unsavory characters. A candidate for the San Francisco board of supervisors worked to bring back those good old days this week. George Davis stripped naked in Times Square, which as far as we know, is not even on the same coast as San Francisco, to make a statement on the right to be nude in public.