A study that has just finished after over 20 years of observation, shows that by decreasing the amount of calories a monkey intakes, it will slow down aging and increase it’s lifespan. They say they are doing this as a trial before going to human experimentation (wow! Eating better can be good for you, who knew?), but why are we trying to extend the life of monkeys?
They are hairy, they smell, they throw their crap at each other, and they were living on borrowed time until we now have given them the proper intel to figure out how to extend their time to devise a plan against us. Screw you science.