Golf. It’s boring, and they wear stupid clothes. These guys, for some asinine reason, find relaxation in the frustration of hitting something the size of an eye into a Dixie cup 300 yards away. Every single one of these geniuses make this sport unwatchable, save for one. Tiger Woods. And no, Bryan, not even your love for flannel pants can make me agree that this game is enjoyable.
I never liked golf until I saw an electrifying young man with a Nike swoosh for a smile win The Master’s when I was 14. But as much as I can’t stand being bored, I can’t turn a blind eye to greatness.
As much as I resented Michael Jordan, I had to watch. As big of a raging ass#### as I think Tom Brady is, I have to watch him in the Super Bowl. As big of a tool as Michael Phelps is, I have to watch him pull a bong hit. Same with Woods, the man commands your attention. Greatness needs to be watched, which is a shame we have had to go almost a year without watching the greatest player of any sport in any time.
Ever since Woods left the PGA Tour last year because of his leg injury, I can honestly say that I have not watched one tournament. But having him come back this weekend is like having a plane pull out of a nosedive before it hits the ground. The sport is interesting again. Woods demands attention, even from me to a sport that I can’t really watch.
Woods is what Al Pacino was to The Godfather. What “Nevermind” was to Nirvana. What Clay Aiken is to Rick Snee’s iPod playlist. Each one of those simply completed the other.
Woods coming back makes golf interesting again, even though you may have forgotten that you were interested in something non-interesting to begin with. Kind of like how you forget about Road Trip until you see it on HBO and you remember that Amy Smart gets naked, so you watch the rest of the movie and remember that it’s sort of tolerable … if you’re buzzed. Well Tiger is the buzz of the PGA Tour, and I for one am glad to have him back.